So, if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall!
-I Corinthians 10:12, NIV
God has placed it upon my heart today to share a caution to faithful spouses. Be careful after making the infidelity discovery!
You are emotionally and sexually vulnerable!
It is so tempting to go to another man or woman to seek the acceptance and validation withheld by a cheating spouse. But to do so would be wrong!
That is to respond to sin with sin.
Think about how you might feel if your spouse decided to strike up a relationship with someone of the opposite gender during this time. Or think back to how you felt when you discovered they already had done so.
Were you hurt by them divulging the intimate struggles of your marriage and essentially inviting this person to speak into your troubled marriage?
If so, then I would recommend refraining from sharing in similar circumstances yourself. (This is different than sharing in a professional setting–e.g. with a therapist or pastor–where the professional is suppose to keep boundaries in place for your safety and healing.)
Plus, I would add to be aware that some people are predators who can smell your emotional and sexual vulnerability. It is best not to willingly open the door to such evil actors.
This is a time to be supported by family, friends of the same gender, and/or professionals like therapists or a wise pastor. One-on-one coffee sessions with a man or woman you just met at church or another social event is unwise.
You do not need to add to the trauma of the situation by becoming entangled in a mess of your own creation.