Break the cycle…Start anew!

See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?

-Isaiah 43:19a, NIV

Reports regarding cycles of infidelity are not uncommon stories here.

This is a sad but true statement.

-Maybe your wife had multiple emotional affairs and this last one you caught her making it physical. You now question whether or not those previous inappropriate relationships were “just” emotional affairs.

-Maybe your husband claims a sex addiction, yet he demonstrates incredible self-control as far as hiding and lying about the depths of his depraved behavior.

-Maybe you had a Christian counselor or pastor tell you how they believed the cheater when he said it was over and that you needed to take him back only to discover the cheating continued just hidden a little better this time.

All of these scenarios are scenarios where a cheater has made infidelity–and all the other sins with it–a habitual sin.

It is more likely for a faithful spouse to experience more adulterous abuse than not in light of such habits. I believe it is unwise to stay under such conditions as it endangers one’s physical, financial, emotional, social, and spiritual well-being.

With this New Year, I am encouraging faithful spouses to bolster their courage and start anew without the cheater!


Others have started anew before you. It can be done and done well.

Also, I want you to know something important. As a pastor, I am hear to tell you about God’s love for you in this awful time:

God does not require you to continue enduring what I consider cycles of extreme emotional and spiritual abuse that comes with being married to a habitual cheater (see here).

I started anew after six years of marriage just a few years ago. Today, I testify to a life God has provided for me that is far better than it was dealing with a lying cheater.

Who knows what rich and fulfilling life God has for you after you decide and act to start anew?