“If a man commits adultery with his neighbor’s wife, both the man and the woman who have committed adultery must be put to death.” -Leviticus 20:10, NLT I am not for bringing back the death penalty for adultery. Ok?! The point of quoting this verse is to expose the absurdity of blaming faithful spouses for … Continue reading “Does the Old Testament say to stone the faithful spouse as well?!”
Category: Trauma of adultery
Awful book published by Focus on the Family(TM) on infidelity
How God Used “the Other Woman”: Saving Your Marriage after Infidelity by Tina Konkin I was shocked and saddened by the recent publication of this book (July 9, 2019) by a source that helped me during my ordeal with an unfaithful spouse. The book description is so awful; I have no plans to buy the … Continue reading “Awful book published by Focus on the Family(TM) on infidelity”
That feeling…
When a spouse announces divorce, the feeling can be devastating. I know that is how I felt when my ex made the announcement about seeing a divorce attorney. The loss of dreams, security, and future are incredible. It is not surprising such news can put a faithful spouse in shock. Shock is a normal grief … Continue reading “That feeling…”
“Bad Christian.” Ok.
“You’re a ‘bad Christian’ for not doing ….” -Cheater This shaming label used to make me jump to do my ex and others’ bidding. I did not want to be seen as a “bad Christian.” Then I wised up to the source. Is an unrepentant adulteress really qualified to wield such a label? Really?! I … Continue reading ““Bad Christian.” Ok.”
Other people can be wrong. Let them!
Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter! -Isaiah 5:20, KJV Part of the injustice faithful spouses often experience is a community of people–even confessing Christians–who will not accept what happened. Some might even accept … Continue reading “Other people can be wrong. Let them!”
Mismatched values as in light and darkness
Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? -2 Corinthians 6:14, KJV Whether one is abandoned or cheated on or both, the reality for faithful spouses is as stark as this verse from 2 Corinthians paints it. Light cannot fellowship with … Continue reading “Mismatched values as in light and darkness”
So NOT friends with ex!
How can righteousness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? -2 Corinthians 6:14b, NLT Some Christians expect faithful spouses to remain “friends” with their cheating ex-partner following divorce. This is insane! The expectation is wound up in a twisted and perverted understanding of what forgiveness demands in this situation. Guess what? … Continue reading “So NOT friends with ex!”
The proper biblical label of adultery is “evil!”
“If a man is discovered committing adultery, both he and the woman must die. In this way, you will purge Israel of such evil.” -Deuteronomy 22:22, NLT What Christians need to understand is that adultery is truly evil! This is not “second fiddle” to divorce. Adultery is the main event in the evil performance. This … Continue reading “The proper biblical label of adultery is “evil!””
PSA: Adultery alone can cause divorce!
And I tell you this, whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery—unless his wife has been unfaithful. -Matthew 19:9, NLT It mystified me why good Christian pastors ever needed to hear more to the story of my marriage’s ending than verification that my ex-wife had committed adultery (and I hadn’t). The probing … Continue reading “PSA: Adultery alone can cause divorce!”
Tantrums and cheater unhappiness
When a cheater is told “No,” they will likely get angry. They may even engage in a toddler tantrum. That is about their maturity level after all. An important lesson for faithful spouses to learn is how we are not responsible for how our cheater feels. We are responsible for our own emotions and actions … Continue reading “Tantrums and cheater unhappiness”