Settled in truth and reality

When I was in the heat of my marriage dissolution, I remember constantly being thrown off by the email responses I received from my (now) ex-wife. They would make me particularly upset when she continued to insist on pinning the fault for the marriage ending on me. Looking back now, I can see how out … Continue reading “Settled in truth and reality”

Cheaters are master manipulators.

Test all things; hold fast what is good. -I Thessalonians 5:21, NKJV A master manipulator knows how to take a potential weakness and work it into a strength. They know how to leverage a situation. Cheaters are master manipulators, IMO. The speed at which a cheater can turn a confession of infidelity into a discussion … Continue reading “Cheaters are master manipulators.”

That Cheater Cycle

Anyone recognize the following cycle? Cheat.  Cheater says, “It was a ‘cry for help.’ [Insert favorite blame directed at faithful spouse].” Cheat, again. Cheater says, “Our marriage problems have nothing to do with [affair partner]. You know that you [insert favorite blame directed at faithful spouse].” Continues cheating. This cycle is nothing new. Cheaters do … Continue reading “That Cheater Cycle”

Don’t give up on God, faithful spouse!

Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him. -James 1:12, NIV The temptation to give up on God is great when going through the spiritual abuse that often comes with a divorce from a … Continue reading “Don’t give up on God, faithful spouse!”

Stop digging up those old “bones.”

“Forget the former things;     do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!” -Isaiah 43:18-19a, NIV Sometimes ruminating on the past just inflicts more suffering.  Not doing this is easier said than done, of course. We do need space to tell our stories plus acknowledge what happened actually happened. That is … Continue reading “Stop digging up those old “bones.””

Caution: Consuming Criticism

Is every criticism worth consuming? Do we always learn something about ourselves from a criticism? Short answer: No. If someone knows you tend to always “consume” or take to heart a criticism, this gives that individual incredible power over you. They are able to control you via their criticism. This is unhealthy and ungodly. Fearing … Continue reading “Caution: Consuming Criticism”

Cheater-Speak: “I wasn’t trying. It just happened.”

“I wasn’t trying to cheat on you. It just sort of ‘happened.’” -Cheater A cheater speaking like this is an unrepentant cheater. How do I know? Well, repentance starts with the honesty of owning one’s own choices and behavior. The cheater speaking like this is not being honest on those fronts. Adultery is just something that … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “I wasn’t trying. It just happened.””