Super Stupid and Divisive

Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother…. -Genesis 2:24a, NKJV Having a father-in-law (FIL) tell his son-in-law how he is “failing” as a husband and man–in general–is incredibly stupid and divisive on the part of the FIL. Something like that happened in my situation as I remember it. I look back on that … Continue reading “Super Stupid and Divisive”

Cheating Is Ultimate Entitlement Behavior!

If a man is found sleeping with another man’s wife, both the man who slept with her and the woman must die. You must purge the evil from Israel. -Deuteronomy 22:22, NIV Ironically, cheaters have been known to act as if the faithful spouse is the selfish one in the marriage. They lack the insight … Continue reading “Cheating Is Ultimate Entitlement Behavior!”

I count three…

“I made a covenant with my eyes not to look with lust at a young woman.” -Job 31:1, NLT Looking back upon old emails around the time of my marriage’s demise, I am struck by how little was made of–what I now consider–my (now ex) wife’s emotionally inappropriate relationships with other men. And it was not … Continue reading “I count three…”

Cheater-speak: “He means nothing to me.”

“[The Other Man/Woman] means nothing to me.” -Cheater It curious how cheaters are willing to throw away very meaningful things–at least, for some people–like their character and marriage vows for someone who they claim “means nothing” to them. My point is such statements coming from a cheater are lies. The cheater might believe them themselves. But … Continue reading “Cheater-speak: “He means nothing to me.””

The Struggle to Let Go

Very truly I tell you, unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies, it remains only a single seed. But if it dies, it produces many seeds. -John 12:24, NIV Letting go of a marriage ravaged by infidelity is hard. I think it is made doubly so–unfortunately–in Christian communities because of all … Continue reading “The Struggle to Let Go”

Mailbag: He blames me for all of it

Waiting on God wrote, I myself am a pastors wife for the past 17 years, and my husband was very love by the congregation because he was so loving to everyone. But little did they know that he was bipolar and was abusive and jealous on me. I have been faithful for the whole 28 … Continue reading “Mailbag: He blames me for all of it”

Capable Versus Actual

For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God… -Romans 3:23, KJV While every human being is a sinner, that does not mean every human being has committed the same sins. Capable does not mean actual. The divorce fear-mongers tell faithful spouses essentially not to hope for a future partner who treats … Continue reading “Capable Versus Actual”

Cheater-speak: “But I am not divorcing you because of [The Other Man/Woman].”

“This is the way of an adulterous woman: She eats and wipes her mouth and says, ‘I’ve done nothing wrong.’” -Proverbs 30:20, NIV “Yes, I crossed the line sexually with [Other Man]. But I am not divorcing you because of [Other Man].” -Adulteress This is just another way of saying that the cheater is unwilling … Continue reading “Cheater-speak: “But I am not divorcing you because of [The Other Man/Woman].””

Stupid, Ignorant Things Christians Say

After the Lord had said these things to Job, he said to Eliphaz the Temanite, “I am angry with you and your two friends, because you have not spoken the truth about me, as my servant Job has. So now take seven bulls and seven rams and go to my servant Job and sacrifice a … Continue reading “Stupid, Ignorant Things Christians Say”