A Holy Saturday sort of feel!

At the place where Jesus was crucified, there was a garden, and in the garden a new tomb, in which no one had ever been laid. Because it was the Jewish day of Preparation and since the tomb was nearby, they laid Jesus there. -John 19:41-42, NIV When dealing with a cheater and the devastation wrought by their … Continue reading “A Holy Saturday sort of feel!”

New and BETTER life a decade later!

Instead of your shame     you will receive a double portion, and instead of disgrace     you will rejoice in your inheritance. And so you will inherit a double portion in your land,     and everlasting joy will be yours. -Isaiah 61:7, NIV A decade ago. My cheater walked out of my life a decade ago abandoning me and our marriage. … Continue reading “New and BETTER life a decade later!”

Two greatest pastoral errors towards faithful spouses

  After the Lord had said these things to Job, he said to Eliphaz the Temanite, “I am angry with you and your two friends, because you have not spoken the truth about me, as my servant Job has….” -Job 42:7, NIV Over and over, I see two common pastoral errors in “helping” faithful spouses. They … Continue reading “Two greatest pastoral errors towards faithful spouses”

“You just weren’t right for each other,” says the Monday-Morning Quarterback.

“You just weren’t right for each other.” -Christian (giving a pass to the cheater) I find this sort of Monday morning quarterbacking annoying. It is obvious that a cheater and faithful spouse have different values based on their actions. That alone says that they are not compatible. If we knew our spouse was going to … Continue reading ““You just weren’t right for each other,” says the Monday-Morning Quarterback.”

Cheater-Speak: “How dare you insist I wear my wedding ring!”

“How dare you insist I wear my wedding ring!” -Petulant Cheater A cheater may take off her ring in order to avoid the constant reminder of her infidelity. This symbolic act speaks volumes. There is a reason we exchange rings in marriage ceremonies. The symbol is indicative of the vows exchanged between the couple before … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “How dare you insist I wear my wedding ring!””

Validation: “Yes, it happened. Yes, it was wrong.”

Reality validation. This is gift others can give to a faithful spouse. Sometimes we need someone to tell us the simple but hard truth. The adultery happened. And–no–we are in no way responsible for the infidelity. It was wrong. No justification for the cheater cheating exists. I think these messages are especially important for the … Continue reading “Validation: “Yes, it happened. Yes, it was wrong.””