In fact, I would pay attention to how eager the cheater is to attend the counseling session.
It might seem counter-intuitive but over-eagerness to attend the couple’s counseling might be a sign that such is not helping. The cheater is too comfortable.
They cannot wait to have a professional fawn over them telling them how “misunderstood” they are and how their spouse is such a failure.
For any faithful spouse who has made this mistake, you know how it feels going to those visits. They feel like emotional beat down sessions.
The cheater and pastor/counselor take turns attempting to convince you the marriage is in trouble because of your “issues.” Cheating is effectively ignored.
For someone who enjoys power, the cheater is going to eagerly attend such sessions, of course. The counselor/pastor is wrapped around their little finger.
In my opinion, such pastors/counselors are complicit in the cheating abuse of the faithful spouse. They are giving cover for the cheater to keep bludgeoning the faithful spouse emotionally and spiritually.
In fact, sometimes these pastors/counselors give the cheater the psycho-babble/spiritually abusive stick with which the cheater beats up the faithful spouse!
A cheater eager to attend counseling sessions with a pastor/therapist is probably not eager to attend for the sake of the marriage. They are there most likely for their own agenda–e.g. punish the faithful spouse, protect their image, control the narrative, etc.
Doubt me? I will leave you with this last question then:
Would a lazy, selfish person who would rather cheat than work on the marriage or file for divorce really suddenly change to eager seek to do the hard work he or she chose to avoid? I doubt it.