Cheaters Are NOT Martyrs But Rather Aggressors!


And don’t you realize that if a man joins himself to a prostitute, he becomes one body with her? For the Scriptures say, “The two are united into one.”

I Corinthians 6:16, NLT

Cheaters seem to enjoy playing the “martyr card.”

They claim their spouse did not give them enough sex or emotional attention. “We never talked.” “You turned me down for sex too much.” “The marriage was already over anyways.”

I am hereby revoking all “Martyr Cards” from cheaters!

Cheaters are not martyrs but aggressors. The adulterous spouse has invited a third party into the marriage union against the other spouse’s explicit wishes to keep said union exclusive–i.e. “…to forsake all others.” In other words, they have invited a third party to rape their spouse’s soul.

Nothing is noble about committing adultery.

I use violent language about adultery because I believe we need that spiritual truth–adultery is soul rape–to sink into our minds and Christian communities. If more people realized that adultery is the raping of faithful spouse’s soul, I suspect the luster or sexiness of cheating would diminish. Plus, the minimizing of how significant and devastating this sin is would probably diminish as well.

It is hard to excuse a cheater trying to play the “martyr card” if one understands such an act of adultery means he or she was involved in raping their spouse’s soul.

And the cheater might not even be ashamed of the fact that he or she committed adultery. Like a convicted rapist saying she was “asking for it,” we need to start treating cheaters who blame their victims as the moral reprobates that they are.

They aren’t a noble marriage martyr.  

Cheaters are soul rapists.*


*Adultery is not an unforgivable sin. However, it does need forgiving. Plus, forgiving it does not change the historical fact that an adulterous spouse was a soul rapist.