Cheaters and “The False Gospel of Self-Fulfillment”

See to it that no one takes you captive through hollow and deceptive philosophy….

-Colossians 2:8a, NIV

Recently, I came across a fascinating article in Christianity Today by Jen Pollock Michel entitled “Glennon Doyle Melton’s Gospel of Self-Fulfillment: Why living your truth bravely isn’t enough.

The article takes aim at the thinking espoused by famous Momastery blogger, Glennon Doyle Melton. This is someone who divorced her husband is now dating women soccer celebrity, Abby Wambach. The article analyzes what Melton shares as justification of her recent life choices and actions.

I am less interested in the details of Melton’s love life and more interested in her message. The philosophy of self-fulfillment sounds eerily familiar. 

It sounds like something cheaters say.

Here’s the major nugget from the article:

…while the self-fulfillment narrative isn’t new, here’s what is: how easily and insidiously it gets baptized as a Christian story. Melton hasn’t simply said: I should be happy. She has emphatically said: God should be equally and unequivocally committed to my happiness as I am.

Sound familiar?

I am convinced my cheater was a disciple of this particular false gospel–i.e. “The Gospel of Self-Fulfillment.” It is a gospel cheaters use to convince themselves of a lie regarding God.

Namely, it is a false gospel they espouse to convince themselves (and others) that God is okay with their sin.


I add “and others”there because cheaters are not satisfied with just espousing this false gospel. Like Melton, they are out to make disciples of this lie about God.

The truth is that God is not interested in supporting our happiness at the cost of our holiness.


Anyone who thinks God is happy for him or her in pursuing a lifestyle of sin is absolutely and totally delusional.

God does not rejoice in anyone running head long down the road of destruction (see 2 Peter 3:9). Yet running down the path of destruction is precisely what a cheater is doing when pursuing his or her adultery partner.

The Bible is unequivocal on this point. The wicked–i.e. those who live in willful, habitual sin–will NOT inherit God’s Kingdom (see I Corinthians 6:9-10). In fact, the Bible tells us that they ought to rather expect God’s fiery judgment as enemies of God (see Hebrews 10:26-27)!

So, to be crystal clear:

God does not rejoice over a spouse breaking his or her marriage vows in committing adultery (not to mention breaking several other Ten Commandments along the way).

And NO, the “happiness” of the cheater sinning joyfully does not change the fact of God’s displeasure over such wicked behavior.


1 thought on “Cheaters and “The False Gospel of Self-Fulfillment””

  1. The woman who cheated with my husband, just preached in her church recently. I found out about it from a fb post so of course I listened. She is honestly so misguided and messed up. It actually helped me to understand her better. No, I don’t feel sorry for It helped me to understand that she really is a Biblical Strange Woman and that she’s (they) are only fooling themselves! I’ve suspected that she’s been trying to taunt me on social media. I didn’t say a word to anyone about that, just gave it to God. Finally, I passed her one day on the road. She doesn’t live to far from me and I was coming the opposite way when I saw her pull out of her neighborhood. We were in a school zone and I know she saw me. I have my husband’s nice truck. I checked her facebook page a few days later and she had put up a song on the same day I saw her. Said she was looking for Christmas Music and came across this fun nostalgic song and how fun it was to find it and remember. I went on you tube. It was a song about sex in the summer. Even mentioned positions….Let’s face it, because every good married Christian Woman, while looking for good Christian Music puts up a song about sex in the summer (when the affair took place) and lets the song describe it! They are so full of themselves and they really think they were entitled.

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