When the choice to divorce wasn’t yours…

When the choice wasn’t yours, you may still have people asking and blaming you for it.

Such blaming is not biblical!

Scripture is clear that we are responsible for our own actions and sins (see 2 Corinthians 5:10). We do not answer for another’s.

It is a good way to go crazy trying to mind-read as it is required to answer why one is divorced when one did not choose to be divorced.

This is why–among other reasons–I am NOT a fan of asking what one contributed to their divorce. Someone filed the papers and is responsible for that action.***

A much more profitable question is what sinful dysfunction one brought into the now defunct marriage. We all–including the never divorced–bring sinful dysfunction into our marriages.

In other words, the question about the sinful dysfunction we brought into our marriages is fair game for divorced AND married Christians.

The problems come when Christians think such questions only need to be answered by the divorced.

Also, the question about sinful dysfunction ought NEVER to be confused as CAUSING the divorce, unless one is prepared to back that up with a biblical defense as to God accepting such as the cause for divorce.

It is dumb to ask someone why they chose to do something–like getting divorced–when they didn’t. And it is cruel to hold them accountable for another’s actions and choices.

In my opinion, that is ungodly.

***By the way, this post is NOT aimed at those who divorced a cowardly cheater. I think clear biblical reasons exist to divorce like adultery (see Jeremiah 3:8, Matthew 19:9, I Corinthians 7:15, etc). It ought to a simple matter answering such questions as a faithful spouse divorcing a cheater.