“If another believer sins, rebuke that person; then if there is repentance, forgive.” -Luke 17:3b, NLT Rebuke, repentance, THEN AND ONLY THEN, forgiveness is to be offered. This is the order Jesus Himself gave us for godly forgiveness. However, this is usually NOT the order presented to faithful spouses or Christians in other traumatic situations. … Continue reading “My frustration with some “Christian” mental health providers”
In the midst of mine enemies
4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. 5 Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. -Psalm 23:4-5, KJV … Continue reading “In the midst of mine enemies”
Those dang old memories…
Grief comes in waves. It ambushes you sometimes from nowhere. I was collecting pictures for an old friend who knew me in my previously married state. In fact, he was the best man at that wedding–i.e. the wedding where I married my cheater. So, it is not surprising the review of those photos brought back … Continue reading “Those dang old memories…”
Book resource: WHEN NARCISSISM COMES TO CHURCH
I just finished a book on narcissism and Christianity. It was full of insights about how these disordered individuals operate in the church and how to address such individuals. The book is When Narcissism Comes to Church: Healing Your Community From Emotional and Spiritual Abuse by Chuck DeGroat. I wrote a post recently from a quote I … Continue reading “Book resource: WHEN NARCISSISM COMES TO CHURCH”
Make that cheater a mere footnote!
So the Lord blessed Job in the second half of his life even more than in the beginning. -Job 42:12a, NLT Faithful Spouses, we have a choice: Do we keep on allowing the cheater to be the central player in our life story or do we go out and take command of our story forging decisions … Continue reading “Make that cheater a mere footnote!”
Not a kiss, but rather a final hug.
“Goodbye in her eyes” by Zac Brown Band It wasn’t a kiss. It was a hug. We had just finished our dentist appointments. She had forgotten that she had made joint appointments. I had already confronted her about the Other Man about two weeks prior. She was still lying about him and still denying adultery. … Continue reading “Not a kiss, but rather a final hug.”
“Yes, it is a problem. Adultery is THE problem!”
Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. -Hebrews 13:4, NIV Which is the biggest marital sin that one can commit according to the Bible? Adultery. Cheaters–and sometimes, even well-meaning pastors–sometimes treat adultery as a side problem to marriage troubles. This … Continue reading ““Yes, it is a problem. Adultery is THE problem!””
Song to bring peace
Songs are such wonderful gifts. I find music helps me move truth from my head down to my heart. Here’s one song I love to listen to when I feel anxious. It helps me reconnect with the truth of God’s love for me. The song is “No Longer Slaves” by Bethel Music:
Claim the truth in song!
“My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me: And I give unto them eternal life; and they shall never perish, neither shall any man pluck them out of my hand. My Father, which gave them me, is greater than all; and no man is able to pluck them out of my Father’s … Continue reading “Claim the truth in song!”
Cheater-Speak: “You weren’t doing enough.”
“You weren’t pulling your weight in this family. So, I was all alone and overwhelmed with everything. That’s why I cheated,” says Cheater. The poor overwhelmed cheater was able to make space in her calendar to lie, steal, and risk the physical well-being of their spouse. Such a cheater is trying to illicit pity in … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “You weren’t doing enough.””