Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that [works] in us, Unto him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus throughout all ages, world without end. Amen.
– Ephesians 3:20-21, KJV (change mine)
DM family after Mrs. DM crushed the Twin Cities Marathon 2015
Sometimes we pray for things that are not in our best interest. That is why I am so thankful to serve a good Father who knows best and gives perfect gifts.
Several years ago, I remember praying for a miracle. I asked God to restore my violated marriage. In some ways, I–along with my family–still held out hope to the very end that God would answer that prayer and give me that miracle.
God said, “No.”
My first marriage ended in divorce. And it felt like the end. I was not happy with God.
But we serve a God who gives “exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think…” I look back on that disappointing answer today and thank God that He said, “No.”
That “No” opened the door the eventual “Yes” that has transformed my life into being a father and husband to a fiercely loyal friend, Mrs. DM. It is truly exceeding abundantly more than I could have asked back in those days sitting in the ashes of my dead marriage.
I write this as an encouragement. Maybe today you are experiencing God’s “No” to your prayers regarding a marriage miracle. God may simply be closing that door in order to prepare you for an abundantly better “Yes.” Have faith and …
Never forget: God is the best giver of gifts!
To this, I personally testify.
~
I will leave you with a classic Garth Brooks song, “Unanswered Prayers”–
I was angry with God when he said “No.” Fought Him for months, nearly a year on it. But I definitely agree with you now.
Really enjoying your blog. Just found it the other day. I grew up in what is now considered “Patriarchy” and men were pretty much allowed to do anything and the woman was to blame. My grandfather and father had multiple affairs, but that was the fault of their wives, you know the drill. What you experienced is so foreign to me, and it has given me new perspective.
Welcome to the blog, sarasamomx5!
The common thread I have seen in the stories about infidelity/adultery is that the faithful spouse gets blamed one way or another–male or female. It is just a sign that The Shared Responsibility Lie has traction in the “Christian” community and needs to be confronted with the actual Biblical truths on the matter–i.e. the faithful spouse is in no way responsible for the adulterous spouse’s sin.
For some unknown reason I have been dwelling all day on the circumstances surrounding our first marriage counselor we had after Dday. He was an excellent Christian counselor who saw right through my husband’s BS and called him out on it immediately. My husband convinced me this counselor did not understand him and we needed to go to someone else. The second counselor was an absolute disaster. I’ve been ruminating today on the thought that if I had put my foot down and stuck with the first counselor that the counselor might have saved our marriage, my kids ‘ family and sent my husband down the path to real salvation. I feel so guilty for not sticking with that counselor. But I open up DM’s blog tonight and it is like God is talking to me through DM’s words. Sometimes the answer is flat out “no.” Did God orchestrate what happened with the counselor’s? Maybe. I just need to trust His plan and wisdom and let go of that guilt. Thank you for the wise words.
I was surprised that when I told my story how many people told me the same thing happened to them. And what is uplifting is that all those people say that the person they are with now are leaps and bounds better than their ex. That gives me something to look forward to.
I think when God says no, He means No – I have something better. But beware of the past trying to open doors that God has closed. I came home last week to find a bag of stuff at my door. Just a reminder from my ex that she’s is still around.