So they sat down with him on the ground seven days and seven nights, and no one spoke a word to him, for they saw that his grief was very great.
-Job 2:13, NKJV
Discovering a spouse has abandoned you and/or cheated upon you is utterly devastating.
Sometimes “all” you can do is listen and pray for the person going through this devastation. But that is a real gift!
Faithful spouses will hear more than their fair share of condemnation and blaming for this tragedy (see “Shared Responsibility Lie” post).
People will be quick to blame the faithful wife for not being sexy enough or engage in enough sex.
People will be quick to blame the faithful husband for being emotionally “abusive” or emotionally “absent.”
It will be a rare friend who does none of this blaming in the face of the devastation and victimization of the faithful spouse. Listening and praying is a precious gift!
Whatever the faithful spouse did or did not do in the marriage is irrelevant.
NO ONE DESERVES TO BE CHEATED UPON AND LIED TO!
They did not “make” their partner cheat upon them. To suggest such is victim blaming pure and simple. And it is cruel.
Be a good friend instead.
Listen and pray.
Trust me, they are good and much needed gifts.