“Why won’t he just own up and confess already? I know he cheated. “
-Exasperated faithful wife
In my experience, faithful spouses are tough and courageous people. They have gone through the fire and have had their amazing strength exposed.
Cheaters, on the other hand…
Some people are just plain cowards.
Faithful spouses are confused by why cheaters won’t own up to their offenses even when caught. Besides the power dynamics, I think another reason is at play.
They would have to face themselves in all their ugliness as revealed by acknowledging their sinful, treacherous deeds.
And quite frankly, cheaters are cowards who find such a courageous undertaking beyond their ability. So, they keep lying and denying to avoid looking in the mirror.
As stated before, we find that puzzling because we are a courageous bunch. Yet we forget that not everyone has that “intestinal fortitude” as my old football coaches would say.
The reason a cheater refuses to confess may not be for dark, plotting reasons. It may be simpler than that.
They choose to live in a fantasy world where they did not do the awful things they actually did do.
Confessing would mean giving up the fantasy.