Works All Things For Good…Nine Years Today

And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose. -Romans 8:28, KJV


DM on August 19th, 2006

Today marks what would have been my nine year anniversary of being married to my (now) ex-wife. The strange thing is sadness no longer hangs over me today. It is like another life.

I like the one I have today.

Three years ago, I do not think I could imagine this day. I had to take Romans 8:28 on blind faith as the natural world was giving me little to nothing to indicate its truth in my life:

  • I was unemployed.

My career prospects looked desperate or downright bleak.

  • I just discovered the Other Man and solid evidence that my (then) wife was having sex with him.

This alone made me shed about twenty pounds in about two weeks from the trauma and shock from that discovery. Who can eat when one has just learned of such betrayal and soul rapeI couldn’t.

  • I was facing an upcoming ecclesiastical trial with my (now) former denomination to keep my minister’s license if my (now) ex-wife chose to push the divorce through as she did.

My desperation to avoid divorce continued to fuel my willingness to accept her continued contemptuous treatment of me (and God). I think I would have accepted less than full repentance from adultery from her at this point if we avoided divorce. But God–thankfully–took that hard decision out of my hands.

I share this to encourage you.

You may find yourself in a dark place. God might seem silent and impotent to you. I assure you God is not. Romans 8:28 is true. I have lived it.

Finally, I will leave you with this encouraging interview with N.T. Wright. This godly man and true pastor has some solid wisdom to share for those who feel like they are the darkest of pits:

N.T. Wright: When It Appears God Isn’t Working

(Click on title above to visit article)


6 thoughts on “Works All Things For Good…Nine Years Today”

  1. Hi DM,

    If you are willing to share.. what is your ex like now? Is she still unrepentant and has no remorse? I just think my stbx will turn around and start acting like a human being but it doesn’t seem to happen. I was just curious since you are much further out from this than I am.

    1. BHB,

      I have had almost no contact with her. My last exchange happened through her lawyer about a year ago. She was threatening to sue me for libel because I posted that she committed adultery. Her problem was that she had provided a written confession to that effect, and I have other evidence as well.

      So, the short answer to your question is that she is still in the grips of the Lie. I have no indication that she has truly repented. Sadly, for her.


      1. People do and say crazy stuff when by their own making, they are caught in cognitive dissonance. My ex wanted me to quickly file for divorce so that she did not have to feel she was continuing in adultery
        It is kind of like the story of the person who murders his parents, but when sentenced for his crime, pleads for mercy from the judge because he is an orphan.

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