Divorcee:“I’m divorced.” Christian church-goer:“I’m sorry. That’s too bad.” Sometimes, it is easy to feel like one has a scarlet “D” tattooed to one’s backside. Do I have to justify my divorce to every Christian to whom I reveal my marital status? I know some of us do not struggle with this. Some people seem bulletproof … Continue reading “Pity Or Empathy: Responding to the Divorced”
Category: Trauma of adultery
Guilty For NOT Confronting Adulterous Spouses
When I say to the wicked, ‘You wicked person, you will surely die,’ and you do not speak out to dissuade them from their ways, that wicked person will die for their sin, and I will hold you accountable for their blood. But if you do warn the wicked person to turn from their ways and … Continue reading “Guilty For NOT Confronting Adulterous Spouses”
“I care about you…”
The words of the reckless pierce like swords, but the tongue of the wise brings healing. -Proverbs 12:18, NIV I care about you but not enough… …to end my friendship with the adulterous spouse until she repents. My thoughts: “Sorry, your concern for me sounds skin deep. Scripture is clear that a person who … Continue reading ““I care about you…””
“You Need To Forgive Your Adulterous Spouse.”
“You sound angry. I really think you need to forgive your spouse for cheating on you. Forgive and forget. After all, Jesus did that for you.” -Christian “Friend” to Faithful Spouse The most hurtful pieces of advice usually have a hint of truth as does this one. We do need to forgive our spouses … Continue reading ““You Need To Forgive Your Adulterous Spouse.””
Responding to Foolish Bible Applications
Be sure to answer the foolish arguments of fools, or they will become wise in their own estimation. -Proverbs 26:5, NLT Often times, I encounter frequent flyers as far as passages used to abuse faithful spouses. Well-meaning or just self-righteous religious people spout off some verse or passage thinking they are dispensing much needed … Continue reading “Responding to Foolish Bible Applications”
Answering Questioners
So when they continued asking Him, He raised Himself up and said to them,“He who is without sin among you, let him throw a stone at her first.” – John 8:7, NKJV This past weekend I had some interesting conversations with people I had just met. They were generally positive interactions on the whole. I appreciated … Continue reading “Answering Questioners”
Do Cheaters Ever Really Win?
And what do you benefit if you gain the whole world but lose your own soul? Is anything worth more than your soul? – Matthew 16:26, NLT During the time of my first marriage’s implosion, I was going through a rough patch in my life. I was working as a barista in a local coffee … Continue reading “Do Cheaters Ever Really Win?”
Mailbag: DM, Your Take On My Past Situation With My Cheating (Now) Ex-Wife
Micheal wrote, Hi Rev. David. At my one and only counseling session with my ex-wife, after I discovered her affair, she openly declared that she fully intended to go away for the weekend with her affair partner and that she wasn’t done with her cheating. She showed no remorse, contrition and she was down right … Continue reading “Mailbag: DM, Your Take On My Past Situation With My Cheating (Now) Ex-Wife”
Stop Lamenting Divorce Rates!
For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.” But if you bite and devour one another, beware lest you be consumed by one another! – Galatians 5:14-15, NKJV Lamenting divorce rates among Christians Likely, it is meant well. Good intentions are there, I am sure. … Continue reading “Stop Lamenting Divorce Rates!”
Clarification: My Goal Is NOT To Shame Faithful Spouses Who Stay
Yesterday, I had an interesting exchange with another pastor who raised a concern. He was wondering if my blogging is shaming for faithful spouses who choose to stay and restore their marriage with a cheater. I am writing today to address that concern. To be crystal clear: My goal is NOT to shame faithful spouses who … Continue reading “Clarification: My Goal Is NOT To Shame Faithful Spouses Who Stay”