In his mercy, God knew I probably would have held onto my first marriage well beyond what was good for me. So, my ex filed on me, and I decided fighting the divorce was not worth it. I was not going to fight against a divorce that a cheater was seeking. That was her choice–yet … Continue reading “Could’ve stayed stuck”
Category: Theology of divorce
Unchosen path
“…when you are old you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.” -John 21:18b, NIV Unfortunately, I was the first. Somehow, my huge family had never experienced a divorce on either side of the immediate family at that time. But I … Continue reading “Unchosen path”
Scary divorce.
For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows. -I Timothy 6:10, KJV A popular Christian curriculum for people going through divorce would regularly try to dissuade people from divorcing by pointing out the financial … Continue reading “Scary divorce.”
False Hope Enables Cheaters Abuse
Sharing only testimonies of reconciled and restored marriages following adultery… …feeds false hope in “reconciliation” for faithful spouses dealing with unrepentant cheaters. Show of hands. How many here thought their marriage was going to “make it” and then you would have a testimony about marriage reconciliation to share with others? I know I did. The … Continue reading “False Hope Enables Cheaters Abuse”
Not really the choice
Even a faithful spouse “choosing” to divorce their cheater is really not the choice. They had chosen to be married for life to a person who left all others. However, that person decided to change things. They chose adultery. That just left bad options for the faithful spouse. The faithful spouse choosing divorce is a person … Continue reading “Not really the choice”
Surprise Anger
She should have begged. I was thinking about the time my now ex-wife admitted to her cheating. She was crying crocodile tears over the phone. These were not tears for me but rather manipulative tears. At the end of her cheating admission, she wanted me to know her cheating wasn’t the reason for her divorcing … Continue reading “Surprise Anger”
Twelve Years! Double My First Marriage.
Twelve Years Strong! When I went through my divorce from my cheater, I had no idea about my future. Everything looked dark and very bleak. That included employment as well as family dreams. So much changed on this day twelve years ago! It remains the happiest day of my life. To the fear purveyors around … Continue reading “Twelve Years! Double My First Marriage.”
Souls are eternal, NOT marriages!
For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven. -Matthew 22:30, KJV This verse is very clear. Jesus tells us human marriage does not endure in heaven. Since this is true, spiritual counsel ought to take this into account. The priority ought to … Continue reading “Souls are eternal, NOT marriages!”
Still… bad enough
A cheater does not need to be a total monster in order to be bad for you. I suspect most cheaters (if not all) have some “redeeming” qualities about themselves. If they didn’t, we probably never would have married them in the first place. They are mix–like all of us–of good and bad traits. But … Continue reading “Still… bad enough”
Ministry of Reconciliation?
All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation…. – 2 Corinthians 5:18, NIV Do we not all have the ministry of reconciliation as followers of Christ? Does that include reconciling with Cheaters? The obvious answer to the first question is “Yes, we are called … Continue reading “Ministry of Reconciliation?”