While doing my year-long residency as a chaplain at a Veterans’ Affairs Medical Center, I gained education on a relatively new area of research and work for professional chaplains and psychologists working especially with combat veterans. Most people today are familiar with the acronym PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder), but I would be surprised if many … Continue reading “Divorce As Moral Injury”
Category: Trauma of adultery
When Divorce Is Always Unacceptable….
When divorce is treated as always unacceptable by Christian leaders… anything else is acceptable. -Lying is acceptable. -Stealing is acceptable. -Physical abuse is acceptable. -Emotional belittling and vitriolic diatribes against a spouse and the kids is acceptable. -Adultery is acceptable. In short, any sort of sin that you can imagine is acceptable. As long as the goal … Continue reading “When Divorce Is Always Unacceptable….”
How An Evangelical Seminary Professor Viewed Adultery
These past few weeks I’ve been critiquing an old book by Dr. J. Carl Laney entitled The Divorce Myth: A Biblical Examination of Divorce and Remarriage. I am spending a great deal of time tackling this book not so much as I believe it is a seminal piece of literature on the matter. My point … Continue reading “How An Evangelical Seminary Professor Viewed Adultery”
More Madness From Dr. Laney
In a sense there is no “innocent” or “guilty” party in a marital break-up. It takes two to make a marriage and it usually takes two to make a divorce. While one partner may be the major contributor to the difficulties, it is hard for me to designate the other partner “innocent.” Did that spouse … Continue reading “More Madness From Dr. Laney”
Emptying Words Of Goodness
And no wonder, for Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light. It is not surprising, then, if his servants also masquerade as servants of righteousness. Their end will be what their actions deserve. – 2 Corinthians 11:14-15, NIV It is hard to make sense of a experience when the words and actions do not … Continue reading “Emptying Words Of Goodness”
“I felt like a used tissue paper.”
“I felt like a used piece of tissue paper. Just thrown away in the trash.” – Vineyard pastor. The quote might not be exact. However, I will never forget the idea. This brave pastoral spouse shared to a young Vineyard Church about her experience of being sexually assaulted. She vividly described how she felt the next … Continue reading ““I felt like a used tissue paper.””
Relax And Be Still
“Be still, and know that I am God!” – Psalm 46:10a, NLT When I was in the shock stage, I often found myself drawing a warm bath with lavender bath salts to ease my stress. I would play worship music to encourage my soul as I soaked in the tub before or after I went … Continue reading “Relax And Be Still”
Adultery Makes Pastors Uncomfortable
Who executes justice for the oppressed, Who gives food to the hungry. The Lord gives freedom to the prisoners. The Lord opens the eyes of the blind; The Lord raises those who are bowed down; The Lord loves the righteous. -Psalm 146:7-8, NKJV Pastors are not marriage therapists. We are pastors. Our area of training … Continue reading “Adultery Makes Pastors Uncomfortable”
Slaying the Fear Giant
For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind. – 2 Timothy 1:7, NKJV The fear of man brings a snare, But whoever trusts in the Lord shall be safe. – Proverbs 29:25, NKJV Are you anxious? Do you worry about what crazy thing … Continue reading “Slaying the Fear Giant”
Grief and Divorce
Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep. – Romans 12:15, KJV Recently, a tragedy struck a community to which I am connected. A young man died in a car accident while going to work. In response, people are sending card(s), flowers, and prayers to his mother plus the work community directly … Continue reading “Grief and Divorce”