Forgive the corny Oldies reference here. I grew up listening to this sort of music as a kid, and I could not help but think of the opening line when processing this–albeit–serious topic of leaving a church. Breaking up is truly a hard thing to do. This past week Mrs. DM and I decided we needed to … Continue reading “Breaking Up With Your Church”
Category: Trauma of adultery
No Benefit of the Doubt Anymore!
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. – Old Italian Proverb What is actually astounding to me is how cheaters and some pastors/counselors fail to grasp why faithful spouses do not trust cheaters’ words at face value? The wise ones among us require verification. In a healthy marriage, one ought … Continue reading “No Benefit of the Doubt Anymore!”
Innocence Lost
DM on his first wedding day (2006) None of my immediate family experienced divorce. We were a sheltered family system–i.e. from grandparents down to first cousins. Divorce had not visited its devastation directly upon us. That was until my marriage was shot in the head on December 12, 2012. I was raised that marriage was … Continue reading “Innocence Lost”
Recognizing a Fake Apology
Then Saul admitted to Samuel, “Yes, I have sinned. I have disobeyed your instructions and the Lord’s command, for I was afraid of the people and did what they demanded. But now, please forgive my sin and come back with me so that I may worship the Lord.” -I Samuel 15:24-25, NLT (e.g. false apology) … Continue reading “Recognizing a Fake Apology”
We don’t need that sort of “care!”
If a pastor or Christian leader is unprepared to confront an adulterous spouse, they ought to have the decency to not bother picking at what they think is wrong in the faithful spouse. Sin inquests into suffering faithful spouses are anything but loving. Such are cold approaches to an excruciating experience. They offer judgment and condemnation when … Continue reading “We don’t need that sort of “care!””
Why Do Only Cheaters Get “The Benefit Of The Doubt?”
Do not listen to an accusation against an elder unless it is confirmed by two or three witnesses. Those who sin should be reprimanded in front of the whole church; this will serve as a strong warning to others. – I Timothy 5:19-20, NLT Why do only adulterous spouses get the benefit of the doubt … Continue reading “Why Do Only Cheaters Get “The Benefit Of The Doubt?””
Presumption of Causation With Divorce
How can you think of saying to your friend, ‘Let me help you get rid of that speck in your eye,’ when you can’t see past the log in your own eye? Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s … Continue reading “Presumption of Causation With Divorce”
Not Relevant To Congregation?!
“Thou shalt not commit adultery.” –God in Exodus 20:14, KJV According to a website drawing its numbers from the Associated Press plus Journal of Marital and Family Therapy, 41% of marriages have minimally one spouse who admits to emotional and/or physical infidelity. Infidelity is a problem. And it is not a minor one. Scripture is clear that … Continue reading “Not Relevant To Congregation?!”
Movie “Divorce Corp.” Reflections
And in hell he lift up his eyes, being in torments, and seeth Abraham afar off, and Lazarus in his bosom. And he cried and said, “Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus, that he may dip the tip of his finger in water, and cool my tongue; for I am tormented in … Continue reading “Movie “Divorce Corp.” Reflections”
Post-Moral Failure: Commentary On Tullian Tchividjian Situation
Controversy still surrounds Tullian Tchividjian, Rev. Billy Graham’s grandson, months after his admission of committing marital unfaithfulness and being removed from pastoring the famed Coral Ridge Presbyterian Church. I first reported on this situation in my post entitled: “Comfort Affairs and Pastor Tullian Tchvidjian’s Tragic Fall.” Subsequently, Tullian has been defrocked–i.e stripped of his ordination … Continue reading “Post-Moral Failure: Commentary On Tullian Tchividjian Situation”