The Lord is pleased with good people, but condemns those who plan evil. Wickedness does not give security, but righteous people stand firm. -Proverbs 12:2-3, GNT A regret? Maybe. I remember confronting my ex-wife one Sunday afternoon following church. It was an encounter that is forever burned into my memory. Vividly, I remember how she … Continue reading “Stand Firm”
Category: Trauma of adultery
“We were already divorced in our hearts.”
For the time will come when people will not put up with sound doctrine.Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear. – 2 Timothy 4:3, NIV Another Common Demonic Lie: “You know that we were already divorced in … Continue reading ““We were already divorced in our hearts.””
More Bad Advice
“Just let her know you are there waiting. Hold the space for the marriage.” – Pastor God did not wait forever for Israel. We see that in Jeremiah 3:8. God accepted Israel’s decisions to choose against the covenant by pursuing adulterous relationships. This is part of the reason I find the advice above unhelpful. It … Continue reading “More Bad Advice”
Necessary But NOT Sufficient
The pastoral impulse to “save” marriages is strong. It is flattering and exhilirating to be a part of a resurrection story where a marriage comes back from its adulterous death. I get it. Who really wants to be the divorce attorney’s pastoral equivalent encouraging only marriage funerals? I don’t. I love miracle stories and would love to be … Continue reading “Necessary But NOT Sufficient”
Two Pastors “Talk” About DM’s Postings on TVC Scandal
Bruce wrote in response to a post (click here), David, I have read most, if not all, of your articles regarding the Village Church situation, browsed many of the links you shared, including the gut-wrenching one in this article of other similar stories. I also listened to Pastor Matt’s sermon on May 31 as I … Continue reading “Two Pastors “Talk” About DM’s Postings on TVC Scandal”
Sometimes You Have To Choose
Pastors, Someday You Will Have To Choose In Your Counsel Between Enabling Adultery or Encouraging Divorce. Is Your Theology Ready For That? I write this as I reflect upon the trainwreck that is The Village Church pastoral care. Here’s a post to some rather hair-raising stories of spiritual abuse (click here). My hope is that … Continue reading “Sometimes You Have To Choose”
The “Victim” Word Phobia
Learn to do good. Seek justice. Help the oppressed. Defend the cause of orphans. Fight for the rights of widows. -Isaiah 1:17, NLT Is it just to treat victims the same way as you treat perpetrators of sins against them? God calls those in power–like pastors and church leaders–to seek justice as seen in this … Continue reading “The “Victim” Word Phobia”
When Dealing With Adultery, You Are Dealing With Evil.
When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things. – I Corinthians 13:11, KJV It is past time the pastors and church leaders wake up and grow up. We live in a world … Continue reading “When Dealing With Adultery, You Are Dealing With Evil.”
“Just Want To Talk” Trojan Horse
“He wouldn’t talk to me about the real issues.” “We just wanted to talk with her.” This was a favorite Trojan Horse of my now ex-wife. It was employed with “Christian” counselors, “friends,” and family as our marriage headed to its ultimate demise. I thought about it as The Village Church debacle hit the fan … Continue reading ““Just Want To Talk” Trojan Horse”
Mark Driscoll, Matt Chandler, and The Village Church Scandal
Today, I am making connections on influence and pastoral teaching. I am hoping to expose how a domineering and controlling pastoral teaching on divorce can infect a whole network of churches if not checked. I am going to talk about how a teaching by ex-Pastor Mark Driscoll appears suspiciously alive and active in The Village … Continue reading “Mark Driscoll, Matt Chandler, and The Village Church Scandal”