Plans go wrong for lack of advice; many advisers bring success. -Proverbs 15:22, NLT I had contrasting experiences with two Christian couples who offered me counsel during and after my divorce. The first couple were a disaster for my marriage. They picked sides and pushed my Cheater towards divorce. The contempt towards me in those … Continue reading “Contrasting Lay Christian Counselors”
Category: Cheating
Gets Angry!
In my distress I called upon the Lord, And cried out to my God; He heard my voice from His temple, And my cry came before Him, even to His ears. Then the earth shook and trembled; The foundations of the hills also quaked and were shaken, Because He was angry. -Psalm 18:6-7, NKJV My God gets … Continue reading “Gets Angry!”
Souls are eternal, not marriages.
For in the resurrection they neither marry, nor are given in marriage, but are as the angels of God in heaven. -Matthew 22:30, KJV This verse is very clear. Jesus tells us human marriage does not endure in heaven. Since this is true, spiritual counsel ought to take this into account. The priority ought to … Continue reading “Souls are eternal, not marriages.”
On “forsaking”
forsake verb: to renounce or turn away from entirely On “…forsaking all others….” When we make this vow at the altar, we are ACTIVELY committing and vowing to give up other partners. It is a commitment that is only beginning that day as it must be renewed each day by each spouse. A wise spouse recognizes … Continue reading “On “forsaking””
On being assertive
On Being Assertive A few weeks ago, I was on a solo trip down to Iowa. On this trip, I went to a local restaurant to have dinner. They asked if it was okay to seat me in a booth, and I acquiesced to this. The problem is that I am a large man. In … Continue reading “On being assertive”
Could have gone differently!
A danger for faithful spouses is focusing on the fantasy and not the reality of their situation. A spouse who cheats is the opposite of what the faithful spouse signed up for on their wedding day. Obviously, the marriage could have gone a very different way. That was the expectation, actually–i.e. a lifelong, faithful relationship. I think … Continue reading “Could have gone differently!”
So cut off
“This is the way of an adulterous woman: She eats and wipes her mouth and says, ‘I’ve done nothing wrong.’” -Proverbs 30:20, NIV This proverb is true for all genders as it comes to cheating. Cheaters have no shame. I was thinking about the phenomenon of Cheaters not connecting the dots as it comes to … Continue reading “So cut off”
So called “Advice”
After the Lord had said these things to Job, he said to Eliphaz the Temanite, “I am angry with you and your two friends, because you have not spoken the truth about me, as my servant Job has. -Job 42:7, NIV Ever had that “friend” who got furious with you because you did not do whatever they told … Continue reading “So called “Advice””
Nary an apology!
When cheating happens, it damages more than just the marriage. It also destroys “friendships” as well. I have no problem questioning how Christian someone is who supports a Cheater over the faithful spouse while fully knowing of the infidelity. Minimally, they are NOT friendship material for the faithful spouse. Further, such people have different values … Continue reading “Nary an apology!”
About power
25 Jesus called them together and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. 26 Not so with you.” -Matthew 20:25-26a, NIV Cheaters lie to hold power over faithful spouses. “Knowledge is power” as the saying goes. This means Cheaters are careful to control who has … Continue reading “About power”