All this is from God, who reconciled us to himself through Christ and gave us the ministry of reconciliation…. – 2 Corinthians 5:18, NIV Do we not all have the ministry of reconciliation as followers of Christ? Does that include reconciling with Cheaters? The obvious answer to the first question is “Yes, we are called … Continue reading “Called to ministry of reconciliation. To Cheaters, too?”
Category: Emotional Affair
Horrors of infidelity abuse!
“Rebuke your mother, rebuke her, for she is not my wife, and I am not her husband. Let her remove the adulterous look from her face and the unfaithfulness from between her breasts.” -Hosea 2:2, NIV Horrors of Infidelity Abuse! Often times, the topic of divorce is taught from the pulpit as the ultimate horror house. This … Continue reading “Horrors of infidelity abuse!”
Important to have validation
Reality validation. This is gift others can give to a faithful spouse. Sometimes we need someone to tell us the simple but hard truth. The adultery happened. And–no–we are in no way responsible for the infidelity. It was wrong. No justification for the cheater cheating exists. I think these messages are especially important for the … Continue reading “Important to have validation”
Shake off your Cheater’s dust!
“But if any place refuses to welcome you or listen to you, shake its dust from your feet as you leave to show that you have abandoned those people to their fate.” -Mark 6:11, NLT At some point, we need to let go of the need for an apology and reparations for the wrongs we … Continue reading “Shake off your Cheater’s dust!”
Tenaciously holding on to truth
“Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” -John 8:32, NIV Regardless of how we feel or what other people–including professionals–say, we did not “make” them cheat and thereby abuse us. This is an important truth to hold on to through this dark season. We are not responsible for another’s … Continue reading “Tenaciously holding on to truth”
Need accountability, not ego-strokes!
“This is the way of an adulterous woman: She eats and wipes her mouth and says, ‘I’ve done nothing wrong.’” -Proverbs 30:20, NIV Cheaters do not need reminders of their special-ness. They do NOT need ego-strokes. They need reminders that they are accountable for their sinful behavior. A godly pastor will keep this in mind … Continue reading “Need accountability, not ego-strokes!”
“…forsaking all others…” means no dating!
If you are still married, you ought not to date. This is an integrity issue. A vow is made to “forsake all others” and dating another while that vow is in effect legally is a violation of your word. Cheaters do this all the time. They make up “excuses” for why they are “allowed” to … Continue reading ““…forsaking all others…” means no dating!”
What went wrong?
“Could we meet up and discuss what went wrong between us?” asks Cheater. You would be forgiven if you thought this question was about understanding and information exchange. It is not. Cheaters know that they cheated. What they do not have is a way to offload their guilt effectively. THAT is the purpose of the … Continue reading “What went wrong?”
“Nothing to do with our marriage problems?” Really?!
“[Other Woman] has nothing to do with our marriage problems,” says caught Cheater. “Really? ‘NOTHING to do with our marriage problems?’” replies flabbergasted faithful spouse. Cheaters will try to hold onto the marriage narrative with an iron grip. That is what this exchange illustrates. They refuse to be seen as the “bad guy” in the … Continue reading ““Nothing to do with our marriage problems?” Really?!”
Do not enter! …their warped reality.
There is more hope for fools than for people who think they are wise. –Proverbs 26:12, NLT They traded the truth about God for a lie…. –Romans 1:25a, NLT Cheaters can come across as so confident in their lies. This confidence has the power to make even the most stalwart faithful spouse second-guess their instincts, hard evidence, … Continue reading “Do not enter! …their warped reality.”