Cheater: “What went wrong between us?” Faithful Spouse: “That’s obvious: The bar trash you were banging is ‘what went wrong between us.’” The cheater-requested marriage autopsy: “What went wrong between us?” When adultery has occurred along the path to divorce, what ended the marriage ought not to be a mystery to any Bible-literate individual. God … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “What went wrong between us?””
Category: Sin
Stronger Than They Think
The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusted in him, and I am helped: therefore my heart greatly rejoiceth; and with my song will I praise him. The LORD is their strength, and he is the saving strength of his anointed. -Psalm 28:7-8, KJV This Psalm was given to me by a … Continue reading “Stronger Than They Think”
Cheater-speak: “I’m careful not to bad-mouth you.”
Now the serpent was more cunning than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. -Genesis 3:1a, NKJV “I’m careful not to bad-mouth you to your friends and family,” says the cheater. This is another tactic by the cheater to control the narrative of the marriage and manage their image. They want the … Continue reading “Cheater-speak: “I’m careful not to bad-mouth you.””
Unwise Permission…
Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies. -Proverbs 31:10, KJV One of my bone-headed moves as a husband in my last marriage was to tolerate unhealthy behavior in my wife without engaging in how such behavior was unwise, at best. In particular, I did not engage her in conversation … Continue reading “Unwise Permission…”
DM on Pastor Darrin Patrick’s Removal
“Now the overseer is to be above reproach, faithful to his wife, temperate, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach….” -I Timothy 3:2, NIV Situation: Megachurch pastor and author, Darrin Patrick, was recently removed from leadership according to a church statement from The Journey’s elders (click here). He is an author and was/is a vice president of … Continue reading “DM on Pastor Darrin Patrick’s Removal”
Cheater Contempt
“Strengthen the feeble hands, steady the knees that give way; say to those with fearful hearts, “Be strong, do not fear; your God will come, he will come with vengeance; with divine retribution he will come to save you.” -Isaiah 35:3-4, NIV Cheater contempt. It is amazing what we, faithful spouses, are willing to tolerate. … Continue reading “Cheater Contempt”
On Cheater Requests To Meet Up Post-Divorce
For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? -2 Corinthians 6:14b, NIV Cheaters requesting post-divorce meetups is such a strange phenomenon to me. I know from reading others’ experiences that this is a real phenomenon. My cheater wanted to meet up after the fact (see post here). … Continue reading “On Cheater Requests To Meet Up Post-Divorce”
A Shotgun Wasn’t There!
Just say a simple, ‘Yes, I will,’ or ‘No, I won’t.’ Anything beyond this is from the evil one. -Matthew 5:37, NLT When cheaters talk about being “trapped” in their marriage, I have little sympathy. Of course, I am willing to grant that they are experiencing “trapped” feelings. But to suggest the faithful spouse is the cause of … Continue reading “A Shotgun Wasn’t There!”
On Loving Lies
They perish because they refused to love the truth and so be saved. For this reason God sends them a powerful delusion so that they will believe the lie and so that all will be condemned who have not believed the truth but have delighted in wickedness. -2 Thessalonians 2:10b-12, NIV It is choice each of us … Continue reading “On Loving Lies”
“Marriage is hard work.”
“Marriage is hard work,” says the pastor to the couple. This statement is true. Marriage does involve hard work. However, it does not paint the fullest–or healthiest–of pictures for marriage. Marriage is not all hard work. At least, that is not how I see God designing it. The Song of Songs suggests marriage is a lot of … Continue reading ““Marriage is hard work.””