“I just was trying to get your attention [by cheating on you],” says Cheater.

Whether they frame it as a “cry for help” or blame it as caused by the marriage conditions, the same mechanism is at work:

The cheater is trying to use the cheating as a means to manipulate the faithful spouse to respond a certain way.

Either that, or they are just making an excuse after getting caught. Why waste excuse-making time, when you can try to manipulate your spouse more? It is sick.

Firing a bullet into someone’s foot will get their attention. It is still very wrong and very harmful to the victim.

The crazy thing about this excuse is how easily taken in Christians are with it. They let the cheater play the victim instead of holding them to account for intentionally blowing a “hole” into their marriage by their sinful behavior.

No, this is pure manipulation by the cheater. Do not fall for it!

 

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*A version of this post ran previously.