PTL: 100,000+ Unique Visitors From 165+ Countries! A little over two years ago, I started Divorce Minister wondering if anyone would bother to read my thoughts about divorce, adultery, and Christianity. Today, I have seen the blog traffic monitor cross a major threshold. The verdict is in… Over one hundred thousand individuals have demonstrated their interest in the subject … Continue reading “DM Blog Milestone: 100,000+ Unique Visitors!!!”
Don’t dig up the “bones.”
“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing!” -Isaiah 43:18-19a, NIV Sometimes ruminating on the past just inflicts more suffering. Not doing this is easier said than done, of course. And we do need space to tell our stories plus acknowledge what happened actually happened. That is … Continue reading “Don’t dig up the “bones.””
Can you live with the lies?
All day long you plot destruction. Your tongue cuts like a sharp razor; you’re an expert at telling lies. You love evil more than good and lies more than truth. -Psalm 52:2-3, NLT I am a firm believer when it comes to full disclosure to the faithful spouse regarding what the cheater did. Darkness is only … Continue reading “Can you live with the lies?”
Notice how Christians expect faithful spouses to pursue but cheaters not?!
Plead with your mother, plead: for she is not my wife, neither am I her husband: let her therefore put away her whoredoms out of her sight, and her adulteries from between her breasts…. -Hosea 2:2, KJV Have you ever noticed how quick Christians are to lay the burden of marriage restoration upon the adultery … Continue reading “Notice how Christians expect faithful spouses to pursue but cheaters not?!”
Not Funny: “I am so glad my wife puts up with me. Ha. Ha.”
Some Pharisees came to him to test him [Jesus]. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?” -Matthew 19:3, NIV Jesus’ response (summarized): NO. Divorce is only permissible for sexual immorality (see Matthew 19:9). It is healthy to extend grace to our spouses for their foibles … Continue reading “Not Funny: “I am so glad my wife puts up with me. Ha. Ha.””
The “Cry for Help” Manipulation
“Don’t you see it [the cheating] was a cry for help?! If only you had ____ (fill in favorite cheater grievance with faithful spouse) more, then I wouldn’t have cheated.” -Unfaithful spouse Using the “Cry for help” excuse for an affair–either emotional or physical–is manipulation pure and simple. The cheater is using this label to … Continue reading “The “Cry for Help” Manipulation”
Reconciling Cheaters, Better Bring Your “A” Game!
Thus saith the LORD, Where is the bill of your mother’s divorcement, whom I have put away? or which of my creditors is it to whom I have sold you? Behold, for your iniquities have ye sold yourselves, and for your transgressions is your mother put away. -Isaiah 50:1, KJV A cheater is not … Continue reading “Reconciling Cheaters, Better Bring Your “A” Game!”
Dumb and Dangerous Advice
“Why don’t you both take a break from each other?” -Clueless Counselor This is one of the dumbness pieces of advice given to a couple dealing with infidelity. The problems of an infidelity ravaged marriage are not solved by creating more distance and less accountability for the cheater. Both are the last things needed, actually. A break is … Continue reading “Dumb and Dangerous Advice”
If blaming…cheaters ain’t there to reconcile!
And he said, “Who told you that you were naked? Have you eaten from the tree that I commanded you not to eat from?” The man said, “The woman you put here with me—she gave me some fruit from the tree, and I ate it.” -Genesis 3:11-12, NIV Just because a cheater goes to couple’s therapy … Continue reading “If blaming…cheaters ain’t there to reconcile!”
DM’s first video blogging…vlogging episode
To get out the message of Divorce Minister: Taking Adultery Seriously to more people, I have started to put my thoughts down in video form. The following YouTube video is just the first teaser of what is to come in the future. Thanks to a regular reader, he has alerted me to the reality that some people … Continue reading “DM’s first video blogging…vlogging episode”