Learn to do good. Seek justice. Help the oppressed. Defend the cause of orphans. Fight for the rights of widows. -Isaiah 1:17, NLT An observation I’ve noticed is how evangelicals are quick to point to God’s forgiveness for adulterers and adulteresses while totally ignoring their victims. It as as if faithful spouses do not exist … Continue reading “God’s Forgiveness Is Great But What About Adultery Victim Care?”
The Oblivious Ones
So watch yourselves. “If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them. – Luke 17:3, NIV If you have survived discovering infidelity and/or gone through divorce, you will inevitably encounter “well-meaning” but oblivious Christians. They may even be related to you by blood. These are the sort of … Continue reading “The Oblivious Ones”
“Monogamy is unnatural.”
A reader of Divorce Minister wrote in asking for me to tackle the old saw that “monogamy is unnatural.” It did not take me long to think of an old Steven Curtis Chapman song addressing such a fatalistic, naturalistic stance: You say, “I am allowed to do anything”—but not everything is good for you. And even though … Continue reading ““Monogamy is unnatural.””
Cheaters Underestimate Faithful Spouses’ Worth
Look at the ravens. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for God feeds them. And you are far more valuable to him than any birds! – Luke 12:24, NLT Words are weighted. It is harder to dismiss hurtful words from someone who is close to us than from some stranger. … Continue reading “Cheaters Underestimate Faithful Spouses’ Worth”
My Ambivalence Towards “Men’s Ministries”
As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. – Proverbs 27:17, NIV Maybe it is just my own story and bad experiences, but these days I am highly skeptical of “Men’s Ministries” (or “Women’s Ministries”). They are often sold as places for men and women to deal with deep issues with their own gender. … Continue reading “My Ambivalence Towards “Men’s Ministries””
Pain Comes From The Good Memories
And no marvel; for Satan himself is transformed into an angel of light. -2 Corinthians 11:14, KJV While discovering adultery is awful, I think some of the more lasting pain comes from the positive experiences one had while married to a cheater. These memories–whether built on a lie or not–suggest things could have been otherwise. … Continue reading “Pain Comes From The Good Memories”
Yea, that’s not God…
“God wants me to be happy! God gave us this [illicit] love for each other, therefore we’re meant to be!” “I met x because God wanted me to meet him/her.” “God sent me (affair partner’s name).” I’ll keep this short and sweet: If God is telling you to be with someone else’s spouse, that’s not … Continue reading “Yea, that’s not God…”
Was Jesus “Damaged Goods”?
Surely he hath borne our griefs, and carried our sorrows: yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted. But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities: the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are healed. -Isaiah 53:4-5, KJV Satan is not … Continue reading “Was Jesus “Damaged Goods”?”
An Rock Anthem For Faithful Spouses!
I dub this: “The Anti-Adultery Tolerance Anthem!” This past week I was listening to the music on my smartphone. “We’re Not Gonna Take It” by the Twisted Sisters popped up, and I thought, “What a wonderful song to strengthen the timid!” Therefore, strengthen your feeble arms and weak knees. -Hebrews 12:12, NIV This is a … Continue reading “An Rock Anthem For Faithful Spouses!”
New Things and A Happy New Year!
Behold, I will do a new thing; now it shall spring forth; shall ye not know it? I will even make a way in the wilderness, and rivers in the desert. -Isaiah 43:19, KJV With the end of 2015, Divorce Minister: Taking Adultery Seriously has officially completed its first full calendar year of existence. It is odd … Continue reading “New Things and A Happy New Year!”