“She cheated,” says Faithful Spouse.
“Well, what you’ve got to do is fight for your marriage. Focus on fixing your shortcomings so that she wants to come back,” says Clueless Christian.
No marriage exists to fight for as long as your cheater keeps lying and cheating.
The very first step is to get the Cheater to stop cheating. They need to cease the harm to the faithful spouse before anything else happens. That is just common sense.
Let’s be clear:
A true friend would never tell someone experiencing abuse to stay in the relationship as long as the other partner was continuing to abuse. That applies to cheating as it is abuse!
Cheating robs the faithful spouse of their ability to determine what is true and real. We have to forever question our life history with our partner as we cannot trust their word regarding when the cheating took place. They are the only ones who have the full truth, and they generally are not generous in sharing the truth.
