10 “‘If a man commits adultery with another man’s wife—with the wife of his neighbor—both the adulterer and the adulteress are to be put to death.”
-Leviticus 20:10, NIV
After discovering adultery, the faithful spouse’s performance as a spouse is often put under the microscope.
We, faithful spouse, might do it ourselves trying to make sense out of what does not make sense. Or we might try to figure it out in an ill-fated attempt to control what we do not control–namely our spouse’s behavior.
Then there are those who put us under the microscope to blame us for our spouse’s cheating.
This can be especially damaging. We can chase our tails trying to take responsibility for something that is not ours to take. Why it’s so damaging is it takes a truth about our imperfection and then lies with it–namely, makes it the cause of our spouse’s sins, which it is not.
No one is perfect as a spouse.
Perfection in performance is not required for a spouse to expect marital fidelity. God does not give anyone a pass to cheat in the Ten Commandments provided their spouse fails to perform perfectly (see Exodus 20:14).
If you feel yourself falling down that rabbit hole of self-flagellation, remember this:
You did not deserve to be defrauded and abused via your spouse’s infidelity and double life. Nothing you did or didn’t do could change that truth!
