Public Service Announcement(PSA):

Use a different therapist than your Cheater’s individual therapist.*

If this therapist was half competent, they would not even agree to work on you as a couple. They would recognize that they naturally would be biased against you, the faithful spouse.

Plus, do you really want the therapist who was present through the cheating?!

At this point, this therapist is just an enabler. They did nothing to stop the cheating and are likely helping your Cheater craft especially nasty narratives about how YOU were at fault (Truth: You are NOT at fault for their cheating!).

If your Cheater is truly repentant, they would get a therapist who is tough and willing to put the full responsibility of their sins on them. At least, then, your Cheater would have a chance at changing as they would start at the right point.

Sadly, I have seen or heard of too many situations where Cheaters have utilized their individual therapist as a means to further brutalize the faithful spouse.

Don’t give them such a golden opportunity. Refuse to go to their individual therapist. That simply won’t work for you, and you are entitled to say as much!

 

 

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*Post written as a consumer and pastor, not a therapist.