Why does cheating for some people seem necessary in their quest for “self discovery”?
I do not see this as necessarily connected. One can explore oneself without betraying one’s spouse.
However, I suspect this behavior is in part a holdover from cheaters never really rebelling as a youth as it wasn’t safe for them. They have stunted their growth, and we–faithful spouses–suffer the costs of their immaturity.
Cheating is abuse. Cheaters are stealing our reality through lies and deception. It is far from a benign quest.
I also think framing their cheating as a quest of “self discovery” is a way to make it more palatable for themselves and others. Who is against “self discovery,” after all?
If this is what they are telling you, it is best to send them packing on their quest with divorce papers. You do not need to stand by and be abused by this immature individual.
