Is engaging in this sort of ministry incompatible with professional chaplaincy? Much confusion exists about what my profession is. People know what a pastor is. They understand what a Catholic Priest is. But people generally do not understand the category of chaplain. In addition to this confusion, professional bodies are in tension over chaplaincy. On … Continue reading “Divorce Minister Content and Chaplaincy Incompatible?”
Category: Trauma of adultery
God sees the injustice!
9 The Lord is a shelter for the oppressed, a refuge in times of trouble. 10 Those who know your name trust in you, for you, O Lord, do not abandon those who search for you. -Psalm 9:9-10, NLT Part of the struggle following infidelity discovery is how the injustice sometimes feels unseen or devalued by outsiders. Faithful spouses are … Continue reading “God sees the injustice!”
Cheating, NOT a private affair!
And this have ye done again, covering the altar of the Lord with tears, with weeping, and with crying out, insomuch that he regardeth not the offering any more, or receiveth it with good will at your hand. Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the Lord hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy … Continue reading “Cheating, NOT a private affair!”
Yes, we DO have a say!
The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife. -I Corinthians 7:4, NLT Cheaters are known to scoff at faithful spouses’ reasonable “demands.” They love to play the card that we have no say in their associations or activities. Yet they think they … Continue reading “Yes, we DO have a say!”
On Forsaking All Others…
Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. – Genesis 2:24, KJV In my fear of being labelled “controlling,” I had a difficult time while my marriage was imploding recognizing healthy jealousy and boundaries. And I suspect I am not alone … Continue reading “On Forsaking All Others…”
Deal with their contempt!
Most importantly, I want to remind you that in the last days scoffers will come, mocking the truth and following their own desires. -2 Peter 3:3, NLT If a cheater is still displaying contempt for their spouse, stop wasting your time on “reconciliation” work. The cheater isn’t repentant. Cheaters speak contempt with fluidity. I find … Continue reading “Deal with their contempt!”
PSA: Do NOT use your cheater’s therapist!
Public Service Announcement: Do NOT use your cheater’s individual therapist for couple’s counseling! One of my many mistakes with my first marriage’s demise was agreeing to see my (now ex) wife’s individual therapist for couple’s counseling. The therapist and her had worked with each other for months, if not years, by that point. I knew … Continue reading “PSA: Do NOT use your cheater’s therapist!”
Cheater Marriage History Revisionism: A brain in blender experience
Telling lies about others is as harmful as hitting them with an ax, wounding them with a sword, or shooting them with a sharp arrow. -Proverbs 25:18, NLT One of the many things that baffles me about the accepted Christian “wisdom” on healing marriages ravaged by adultery is how often pastors and counselors seem to … Continue reading “Cheater Marriage History Revisionism: A brain in blender experience”
Children calling out cheater mother obituary pulled
Some might have seen the news about an obituary causing a stir with the children of the deceased publicly exposing their mother’s affair and abandonment of them as children. Their words about their deceased mother were blunt. The short version is they are glad she is no longer living and is now facing God’s judgment. … Continue reading “Children calling out cheater mother obituary pulled”
Gottman WaPo Article on Marriage Myths
Last Friday, The Washington Post ran an article addressing five myths regarding marriage. The article is entitled, “Five Myths About Marriage” and is written by John Gottman and Christopher Dollard. For those who are unaware, the Gottmans are relationship research experts due to their very thorough longitudinal scientific study of relationships. They are giants in the literature as … Continue reading “Gottman WaPo Article on Marriage Myths”