When my divorce was going through against my will (at the time), I experienced heightened spiritual distress. This was distress over disappointing the Ultimate Authority–i.e. God. Cognitively, I understood that I had no power to stop the divorce. My best friend spoke the truth to me earlier in September when he called out that … Continue reading ““Disappointing The Ultimate Authority” Handle”
Category: Trauma of adultery
DM Review: EFCA’s Revised Divorced Credentials Policy (Part III)
PART III: Reviewing the EFCA’s Policy Regarding Divorced Ministers ***This is the final installment of a review broken down into three parts. For more information and background, please read Part I and Part II.*** When the Evangelical Free Church of America (EFCA) revised their policy regarding divorced ministers in 2015, they did much good while … Continue reading “DM Review: EFCA’s Revised Divorced Credentials Policy (Part III)”
DM Review: EFCA’s Revised Divorced Credentials Policy (Part II)
PART II: Reviewing EFCA’s New Policy Regarding Divorced Ministers ***This is a continuation of series of posts regarding a change in divorce policy with this prominent evangelical denomination. To view the first post that comes with important background to the discussion click here.*** As stated in Part I, I am writing this review in order … Continue reading “DM Review: EFCA’s Revised Divorced Credentials Policy (Part II)”
DM Review: EFCA’s Revised Divorced Credentials Policy (Part I)
PART I: Reviewing the recent policy changes in the Evangelical Free Church of America (EFCA) regarding credentialing divorced individuals Link to the revised policy document (click here). Background: The EFCA is a denomination with Scandinavian origins started in the United States in the 1880s. It became the current denomination under the name the Evangelical Free … Continue reading “DM Review: EFCA’s Revised Divorced Credentials Policy (Part I)”
You Should Be Grateful…
“You should be grateful… …that we allowed you to keep your ministerial credentials.” -A Denominational Official/Pastor While not an actual direct quote from someone, I did encountered this sort of sentiment when dealing with evangelical pastors regarding my divorce and profession. Such thinking was “justified” usually by referring to the sub-culture where old-school, (fundamentalist), evangelical denominations … Continue reading “You Should Be Grateful…”
Adultery victims exist. True story.
Acquitting the guilty and condemning the innocent— both are detestable to the Lord. -Proverbs 17:15, NLT Adultery and abandonment victims exist. In fact, they exist in churches just as they exist in the general populace. This truth might be a shocker to some pastors. But it is a true story. Some of us are not … Continue reading “Adultery victims exist. True story.”
Mailbag: “‘Feeling self-righteous and morally superior is a big trap.'”
Today, Chump Lady sent me this comment from her blog highlighting some rather awful advice given by a minister to a faithful spouse: I am so glad to read this post and all the replies tonight. I had an email exchange with my (former) minister earlier today that really frustrated me. I reached out to … Continue reading “Mailbag: “‘Feeling self-righteous and morally superior is a big trap.’””
“Broken” Home Shaming
Father to the fatherless, defender of widows— this is God, whose dwelling is holy. God places the lonely in families; he sets the prisoners free and gives them joy. But he makes the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land. -Psalm 68:5-6, NLT “Broken” Home Shaming I call it “Broken Home Shaming” because I notice how … Continue reading ““Broken” Home Shaming”
Stacked Deck
Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves; ensure justice for those being crushed. Yes, speak up for the poor and helpless, and see that they get justice. -Proverbs 31:8-9, NLT When you have just discovered your spouse of x years has cheated on you, it is hard to make good choices and not … Continue reading “Stacked Deck”
Choosing “neutrality” is STILL a choice!
Thou shalt not commit adultery. -Exodus 20:14, KJV But since you are like lukewarm water, neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth! – Revelation 3:16, NLT Some people simply do not engage in ugliness that adultery brings. They claim neutrality or attempt to avoid acknowledging the inconvenient truth that a … Continue reading “Choosing “neutrality” is STILL a choice!”