When I was attending counseling sessions with my ex, I remember feeling full of panic going to these lay counselors. The time with them was upsetting to put it mildly. I suspect my anger and fear–i.e. panic–were registering danger even though my head was unable to make sense of it in the moment. God has … Continue reading “Sometimes our spirits register wrongs”
Category: Anger
“I didn’t tell you, because I thought you would get angry,” says Cheater.
“I didn’t tell you, because I thought you’d get angry.” -Cheater Let’s start to unpack this “gem” of a cheater-speak: 1. The cheater is aware that what he or she did might be upsetting to the faithful spouse, yet still did it. This is another reason why I am in the camp that cheaters have full knowledge … Continue reading ““I didn’t tell you, because I thought you would get angry,” says Cheater.”
Dispersed Anger
God is an honest judge. He is angry with the wicked every day. -Psalm 7:11, NLT Oddly enough, my anger was often directed to other bad actors in my divorce instead of the prime character–my (now) ex-wife. Certainly, I had good reason to feel angry towards those others. It was actually healthy to feel this feeling … Continue reading “Dispersed Anger”
Did you know God commands us to be angry!
Be angry, and do not sin. -Psalm 4:4a & Ephesians 4:26a, NKJV Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. -Ephesians 4:31, NKJV I purposefully placed these two verses together to highlight the confusion within evangelical Christianity as far as it comes to the emotion of … Continue reading “Did you know God commands us to be angry!”
Tantrums and cheater unhappiness
When a cheater is told “No,” they will likely get angry. They may even engage in a toddler tantrum. That is about their maturity level after all. An important lesson for faithful spouses to learn is how we are not responsible for how our cheater feels. We are responsible for our own emotions and actions … Continue reading “Tantrums and cheater unhappiness”
Relief of Acknowledgment
Rejoice with them that do rejoice, and weep with them that weep. -Romans 12:15, KJV When going through adultery discovery, the validation of true friends is a balm to a hurting soul. Religious people are tempted to foist “forgiveness” on the grieving faithful spouse. They skip over the acknowledgement of the severe injustices the faithful … Continue reading “Relief of Acknowledgment”
DM Book Sale!
For a limited time, I have dropped prices on my book. Currently, I have dropped the paperback prices from $12.99 to $8.99. The eBook is now only $3.99 from its regular price of $7.99. As you purchase books, read, and share the ideas in the book, you are helping spread these much needed ideas. The … Continue reading “DM Book Sale!”
Faithful Spouses, let those cheaters be angry.
It is not your job to manage your spouse’s emotions. We must manage our own. God will call us to account for how we act, which is another way of saying how we manage our emotions (see 2 Corinthians 5:10). While I encourage you to allow your cheater to be upset, I want to be … Continue reading “Faithful Spouses, let those cheaters be angry.”
My God gets angry!
In my distress I called upon the Lord, And cried out to my God; He heard my voice from His temple, And my cry came before Him, even to His ears. Then the earth shook and trembled; The foundations of the hills also quaked and were shaken, Because He was angry. -Psalm 18:6-7, NKJV My God gets … Continue reading “My God gets angry!”
DM, Why do they still support the cheater?
Dear Divorce Minister, I was married to a minister for 21 years. I knew after a year of marriage that my marriage was over as he was cheating on me with a high school student. When I confronted him, the narcissistic abuse began and continued until he asked for a divorce after he got caught … Continue reading “DM, Why do they still support the cheater?”