“You were all so busy with the kids. I felt neglected.” -Cheater “I never would have cheated if you had given me the attention he did!” -Cheater Thou shalt not commit adultery. -Exodus 20:14, KJV Your cheater may try to “justify” their sin to you. Maybe they will point to you spending too much time … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “I had unmet emotional needs in our marriage.””
Category: Cheating
More details exposed in Lysa TerKeurst divorce
The [divorce] pleadings contain a series of text messages between Art [TerKeurst] and “Mistress X,” whom he allegedly met on the website SugarDaddy.com. He allegedly spent at least $118,000 of the TerKeursts’ money on the relationship, including paying for the mistress to move from Atlanta to Charlotte (near where Art resided), and buying her a … Continue reading “More details exposed in Lysa TerKeurst divorce”
Disarm the “brain blender” before talking marriage “history”
Telling lies about others is as harmful as hitting them with an ax, wounding them with a sword, or shooting them with a sharp arrow. -Proverbs 25:18, NLT One of the many things that baffles me about the accepted Christian “wisdom” on healing marriages ravaged by adultery is how often pastors and counselors seem to … Continue reading “Disarm the “brain blender” before talking marriage “history””
O, the cost! Divorce scare tactics.
For the love of money is the root of all evil: which while some coveted after, they have erred from the faith, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows. -I Timothy 6:10, KJV A popular Christian curriculum for people going through divorce would regularly try to dissuade people from divorcing by pointing out the financial … Continue reading “O, the cost! Divorce scare tactics.”
Comfort from eternal belonging to God’s family
33 Who dares accuse us whom God has chosen for his own? No one—for God himself has given us right standing with himself. 34 Who then will condemn us? -Romans 8:33-34a, NLT Uncertainty breeds fear. Our minds can imagine all sorts of horrors as we sit in a place of uncertainty. Marriage limbo is not an enjoyable place … Continue reading “Comfort from eternal belonging to God’s family”
Refuse to go another round on the crazy ride!
To heal, we have to acknowledge the truth. The sad thing is our cheater may never actually do this. They might engage you in an endless battle over getting you to take responsibility for their abuse of you. That argument is one crazy ride. Refuse to take the bait. While helpful, you do not have … Continue reading “Refuse to go another round on the crazy ride!”
Lack of gratitude is a major red flag!
“Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—as her great love has shown. But whoever has been forgiven little loves little.” -Luke 7:47, NIV The amount of gratitude ought to match the amount forgiven. This is one lesson I take from Jesus’ teaching in this verse. And it is an important spiritual lesson … Continue reading “Lack of gratitude is a major red flag!”
Pro-Tip: A refusal to engage on relationship positives is discard preparation.
When a cheater is done with you, they might refuse to talk about what they enjoy about being married to you. This makes it easier on them both to cheat on you and to discard you. After all, the positives would remind them of real losses that come with the ending of the marriage. Such … Continue reading “Pro-Tip: A refusal to engage on relationship positives is discard preparation.”
Cheater lines…
“I don’t love you anymore.” “I feel like we are just roommates.” “I need space.” Have you heard any of these “gems” come out of your cheater’s mouth? Maybe they spoke such words before you knew they were cheating on you? That would make sense. As these words are designed to hide their dastardly behavior … Continue reading “Cheater lines…”
Rooted in Christ’s love
And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18 may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19 and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God. -Ephesians 3:17b-19, NIV Do … Continue reading “Rooted in Christ’s love”