You know that everyone in the province of Asia has deserted me, including Phygelus and Hermogenes. -2 Timothy 1:15, NIV Not all your “friends” before the infidelity discovery will remain your friends afterwards. This is a hard truth to accept. Yet it is a reality best accepted to avoid further heartache. I think this is one of … Continue reading “You will lose some “friends.””
Category: Cheating
Learning truth
31 To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, “If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. 32 Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” -John 8:31-32, NIV One of the more enduring negative impacts from Cheaters and their allies are the lies they tell us about ourselves. Some have … Continue reading “Learning truth”
“Telling would hurt his reputation.”
“Telling would hurt his reputation,” says Cheater Apologist. No, what has harmed his reputation is behaving in a harmful way. People knowing about it is just revealing his TRUE reputation. Faithful spouses are often too hesitant to speak the ugly truth about their cheater. They worry that they would be wrong to say out loud … Continue reading ““Telling would hurt his reputation.””
My thoughts on dating
When I started dating for the second time, I had a few things I promised myself to do and some things I learned along the way (to Mrs. DM): I did not start dating until after I was officially divorced. My stance is that I needed to see the divorce to go through to be … Continue reading “My thoughts on dating”
Not Blaming: Who does it really benefit?
Not Blaming: Who does it really benefit? I would argue refusing to assign blame in a situation with marital infidelity “benefits” the cheater. They get to be treated as if what happened was either a shared problem or an unfortunate event (both lies, by the way). In other words, they get to avoid taking responsibility … Continue reading “Not Blaming: Who does it really benefit?”
Eyes of faith – Romans 8:28
And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are the called according to His purpose. -Romans 8:28, NKJV Sometimes, Christians use this verse to short-circuit the grieving process. They try to silence someone in pain by quoting this at them. That is unhelpful. While I believe the Bible … Continue reading “Eyes of faith – Romans 8:28”
A mere footnoote
So the Lord blessed Job in the second half of his life even more than in the beginning. -Job 42:12a, NLT Faithful Spouses, we have a choice: Do we keep on allowing the cheater to be the central player in our life story or do we go out and take command of our story forging decisions … Continue reading “A mere footnoote”
Refuse Responsibility For Emotional Affairs
“If only you had spent more time talking with me, I wouldn’t have cheated on you with him,” says Cheater. Do NOT take responsibility for your cheater’s emotional affair! Your cheater–and others–may try to blame you for being cheated on, but that is just wrong. The cheater could have chosen otherwise. She is 100% responsible … Continue reading “Refuse Responsibility For Emotional Affairs”
Review of “Betrayal: The Perfect Husband”
“Betrayal: The Perfect Husband” is a three-part documentary on Hulu based on a podcast (“Betrayal: Season One”) on the same subject matter. The story follows one faithful spouse, Jen, and the story of her discovering her husband, Spencer, as both a cheater and criminal having sexually abused some of his high school students. The TV … Continue reading “Review of “Betrayal: The Perfect Husband””
“Stuck in Victimhood” Label
He has shown you, O mortal, what is good. And what does the Lord require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God. -Micah 6:8, NIV Is it acting justly to shame infidelity victims for daring to voice the truth of being victimized? This is what can happen when … Continue reading ““Stuck in Victimhood” Label”