The Lord blessed the latter part of Job’s life more than the former part. -Job 42:12a, NIV With all the fear-mongering that happens in evangelical Christian circles, one might think divorce dooms you to a life of misery. Or… I think this might be worse–it means you will always have a second-class marriage if you … Continue reading “Not All Doom and Gloom”
Category: Emotional Affair
Thoughts for Cheaters
For the lips of the adulterous woman drip honey, and her speech is smoother than oil; but in the end she is bitter as gall, sharp as a double-edged sword. -Proverbs 5:3-4, NIV So, a friend cheated. What do you do? What do you say to them? 1. Urge them to come COMPLETELY clean with … Continue reading “Thoughts for Cheaters”
Confessing Is NOT Causing
Don’t you realize that your bodies are actually parts of Christ? Should a man take his body, which is part of Christ, and join it to a prostitute? Never! And don’t you realize that if a man joins himself to a prostitute, he becomes one body with her? For the Scriptures say, “The two are … Continue reading “Confessing Is NOT Causing”
On “Deadwood Friends”
But Jesus said, “Judas, would you betray the Son of Man with a kiss?” -Luke 22:48, NLT Some “friends” will “kiss” you with words-bespeaking of their love for you-while they further the cheater’s agenda of blame-shifting the infidelity and marriage’s demise upon you. It is confusing enough dealing with the lies and deceptions of a … Continue reading “On “Deadwood Friends””
Cannot Help Themselves
Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. -Hebrews 13:4, NIV Even–maybe especially–when caught red-handed and finally acknowledging their infidelity, cheaters will STILL try to shift the attention onto the faithful spouse’s “deficiencies.” The majority of their confession is light … Continue reading “Cannot Help Themselves”
On Sin and Difficult Circumstances
“What have you done?” asked Samuel. Saul replied, “When I saw that the men were scattering, and that you did not come at the set time, and that the Philistines were assembling at Mikmash, I thought, ‘Now the Philistines will come down against me at Gilgal, and I have not sought the Lord’s favor.’ So … Continue reading “On Sin and Difficult Circumstances”
When a lack of sex (or attention) is treated as the cause…
“For it is from within, out of a person’s heart, that evil thoughts come—sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, greed, malice, deceit, lewdness, envy, slander, arrogance and folly. All these evils come from inside and defile a person.” -Mark 7:21-23, NIV When a lack of sex (or attention) is treated as the cause… Infidelity is not … Continue reading “When a lack of sex (or attention) is treated as the cause…”
More Attention? More Sex?
The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. -I Corinthians 7:3, NIV Cheaters like to shift the blame upon faithful spouses after the fact! -A cheating husband might attack his wife by talking about how he would never have cheated if they had had more sex. -A … Continue reading “More Attention? More Sex?”
Cheater-Speak: “Our relationship was toxic.”
Thou shalt not commit adultery. -Exodus 20:14, KJV Did I miss something? When I read this verse–part of the Ten Commandments–I don’t see where it says, “Thou shalt not commit adultery unless [you believe] your marriage is a toxic relationship.” I don’t see it because it is NOT there! This is an especially lame cheater excuse or … Continue reading “Cheater-Speak: “Our relationship was toxic.””
Some Healthy and Godly Boundaries
“If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them.” -Luke 17:3b, NIV Confusion is great dealing with a cheater. Sadly, pastors and other Christian leaders too often do not help faithful spouses through this confusion. They add to it in an attempt to look impartial and “professional.” These are … Continue reading “Some Healthy and Godly Boundaries”