Keeping you stuck through denial

How many were deceived for a longer period of time because your cheater explicitly denied what he or she was doing? “I would never cheat on you.”  “You know me better than that. There isn’t another man [woman] involved.” “We need to focus on your problems. Don’t worry about me. I wouldn’t cheat on you.” … Continue reading “Keeping you stuck through denial”

Those “friends” are not your friends!

If a man is found sleeping with another man’s wife, both must die. Purge that evil from Israel. -Deuteronomy 22:22, The Message (emphasis mine) Those “friends” One of the most difficult lessons I learned from discovering my first wife’s adultery and going through divorce is that it is okay–in fact, good–to have deal-breakers in friendships. … Continue reading “Those “friends” are not your friends!”

Dangerous Lie: Bad marriages cause infidelity.

  “For out of the heart come evil thoughts—murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander. These are what defile a person….” -Matthew 15:19-20a, NIV Bad marriages cause infidelity = Lie! When Jesus talks here about sexual immorality and adultery, I do not see any long explanation about the sad state of the culture around … Continue reading “Dangerous Lie: Bad marriages cause infidelity.”

If verifying the affairs(s) are over isn’t first priority…

When a Christian counselor or pastor chooses to treat the ending of the affair as a secondary issue, you can be assured they are not equipped to deal with the situation in a godly matter. Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the … Continue reading “If verifying the affairs(s) are over isn’t first priority…”

Lying lifestyle spiritual problem for cheaters

19 And this is the condemnation, that light is come into the world, and men loved darkness rather than light, because their deeds were evil. 20 For every one that doeth evil hateth the light, neither cometh to the light, lest his deeds should be reproved. -John 3:19-20, KJV I have a theory about why some cheaters refuse to … Continue reading “Lying lifestyle spiritual problem for cheaters”

God did NOT send the Other Woman or Other Man to your spouse!

God is never tempted to do wrong, and he never tempts anyone else. -James 1:13b, NLT God did not send the Other Woman (OW) or Other Man (OM) into your spouse’s life. It is sad that this even needs to be stated. However, I am sure plenty of readers here have heard their cheater try … Continue reading “God did NOT send the Other Woman or Other Man to your spouse!”

Then it ALL started to make sense…

Relief. The months of stone-cold or downright cruel responses. Warmth disappearing overnight like a Minnesotan May blizzard. It all started to make sense. I wasn’t imagining things. The Other Man. He existed. Had existed for months! This is one of the strangest and most surreal parts of discovering infidelity. The moment of confirmation is not only … Continue reading “Then it ALL started to make sense…”

Words a faithful spouse needs to hear

Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. -Hebrews 13:4, NIV “Yes, it happened. She cheated on you. And that’s right: you didn’t deserve it. It’s not your fault. Not at all.” You really want to help a faithful spouse. … Continue reading “Words a faithful spouse needs to hear”

Forgiveness as faith test

From his temple he heard my voice;     my cry came before him, into his ears. The earth trembled and quaked,     and the foundations of the mountains shook;     they trembled because he was angry. -Psalm 18:6b-7, NIV Can I trust God with my hurt? I think the answer to this question answering the question of whether or not … Continue reading “Forgiveness as faith test”