Entrust Your Situation To God

He did not retaliate when he was insulted,     nor threaten revenge when he suffered. He left his case in the hands of God,     who always judges fairly. -I Peter 2:23, NLT The secret to dealing with injustice is remembering a higher court exists and we know its Judge is good. Faith in this Judge allows … Continue reading “Entrust Your Situation To God”

Totally seared

Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron…. -I Timothy 4:2, KJV Hypocritical liars will deceive many, and their consciences won’t bother them at all! -I Timothy 4:2, TPT While this verse is really about false teachers leading people astray, I think it applies to cheaters as well. This verse reminds … Continue reading “Totally seared”

God did not fail as the head of the marriage!

She saw that I divorced faithless Israel because of her adultery. -Jeremiah 3:8a, NLT For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church…. -Ephesians 5:23a, KJV When pastors and elders choose to blame marriages ending on men failing as “spiritual heads,” I would like them to … Continue reading “God did not fail as the head of the marriage!”

“Exit Affair” Minimization

“We both know our marriage was in trouble for years. The affair wasn’t really the issue. It was just an exit affair.” -Cheater I hate how people minimize the damage of adultery by labeling some affairs: “exit affairs.” Does it make it less of a sin in God’s eyes if it was an “exit affair?” … Continue reading ““Exit Affair” Minimization”

Counts as cheating?

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” -Matthew 5:27-28, NIV “I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another woman commits adultery.” -Matthew … Continue reading “Counts as cheating?”

Choosing battles and bridges to burn

To everything there is a season, A time for every purpose under heaven…. -Ecclesiastes 3:1, NKJV Not every battle is worth fighting with a disordered individual. Not every bridge is worth maintaining. Some battles are best left alone. Some bridges are best burned. There is a season for everything. Many of us are not inclined to fight. … Continue reading “Choosing battles and bridges to burn”

A most reasonable expectation

“…let her therefore put away her whoredoms out of her sight, and her adulteries from between her breasts….” -Hosea 2:2b, KJV A Faithful Spouse’s Reasonable Expectation: The cheater ends the affair(s)–both physical and emotional varieties–and engages in actions demonstrating self-work on the character flaws that led the cheater to betray their partner. This expectation needs … Continue reading “A most reasonable expectation”

“Have you rebuked her?”

“Take heed to yourselves. If your brother sins against you, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him.” -Luke 17:3, NKJV “Did you rebuke her?” This question never came up in my ecclesiastical trial to retain my ministerial credentials.* They were quick to ask me about “forgiveness,” yet they did not ask this important question as far as … Continue reading ““Have you rebuked her?””

Why bother to blame?

“For I, the LORD, love justice. I hate robbery and wrongdoing. I will faithfully reward my people for their suffering and make an everlasting covenant with them.” -Isaiah 61:8, NLT When I was going through my ecclesiastical trial to keep my ministerial credentials, someone I trusted asked me why my former denomination was so fixated … Continue reading “Why bother to blame?”