“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted And saves those who are crushed in spirit.” -Psalm 34:18, NASB Metaphors, while being imperfect approximations, often can help us grasp difficult and complex truths conveying both intellectual and emotional freight with vivid imagery. Here’s my shot on explaining by metaphor why focusing on forgiveness first after adultery is cruel: Imagine … Continue reading “Lock the doors, grieve the loss, and don’t be a jerk!”
Category: Forgiveness
Cheater-speak: “God forgives me. So, what’s your problem?!”
Therefore if you bring your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your gift there before the altar, and go your way. First be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. -Matthew 5:23-24, NKJV “God forgives me. So what’s your problem?!” -Cheater Does … Continue reading “Cheater-speak: “God forgives me. So, what’s your problem?!””
Broken Vase Illustration
Another thing you do: You flood the Lord’s altar with tears. You weep and wail because he no longer looks with favor on your offerings or accepts them with pleasure from your hands. You ask, “Why?” It is because the Lord is the witness between you and the wife of your youth. You have been … Continue reading “Broken Vase Illustration”
Price for “Support”
Hate evil and love what is good; turn your courts into true halls of justice. Perhaps even yet the Lord God of Heaven’s Armies will have mercy on the remnant of his people. -Amos 5:15, NLT Divorce Minister: Taking Adultery Seriously is an online community where I do not blame the victims of adultery. Too often, I … Continue reading “Price for “Support””
Helping The Broken-Hearted Betrayed Spouse
A Christian brother comes over one night. He crumples onto your couch tears overflowing. Through his heaving sobs, you learn his wife has left him and is having sex with another man. The hollow and desperate look in his eyes tears at your heart. What can you do? I will start with the negative first. These dangerous responses … Continue reading “Helping The Broken-Hearted Betrayed Spouse”
Where are the personal responsibility people when it comes to cheaters?!
Where are all the personal responsibility preachers when it comes to talking to cheaters?! -Much is made of the faithful spouse taking personal responsibility for “their part” in the divorce. -Much is made of the faithful spouse taking personal responsibility to forgive their cheater. (In fact, they feel compelled to “speak into” the faithful spouse’s … Continue reading “Where are the personal responsibility people when it comes to cheaters?!”
Grateful for Brave Other Faithful Spouses
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God. -2 Corinthians 1:3-4, NIV I am grateful for faithful spouses who opened … Continue reading “Grateful for Brave Other Faithful Spouses”
Deep Dive: Abuse Survivor’s Forgiveness Definition
Rachael Denhollander did an interview with Christianity Today. Her responses to how coming out as a sexual assault victim of Larry Nassar, the disgraced gymnastics doctor and convicted predator, has impacted her in her Christian community are profound. I did a whole blog post on my thoughts in dialogue with her responses in that interview (click … Continue reading “Deep Dive: Abuse Survivor’s Forgiveness Definition”
More from Rachael Denhollander, former gymnast and sexual abuse survivor…
Recently, the testimony of Rachel Denhollander caught fire in the Christian community for her bringing her faith to bear in the trial of her former abuser, Larry Nassar. I shared a link to the transcripts of her testimony as I found her statements clear and well-articulated explanations of forgiveness and justice in the light of … Continue reading “More from Rachael Denhollander, former gymnast and sexual abuse survivor…”
Cheaters ARE eligible for forgiveness and grace as long as…
Dear friends, if we deliberately continue sinning after we have received knowledge of the truth, there is no longer any sacrifice that will cover these sins. There is only the terrible expectation of God’s judgment and the raging fire that will consume his enemies. -Hebrews 10:26-27, NLT Cheaters ARE eligible for forgiveness and grace as long … Continue reading “Cheaters ARE eligible for forgiveness and grace as long as…”