“Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her…” –Ephesians 5:23-24, NIV If you have spent anytime in an evangelical church of any sort, you likely have heard these verses read … Continue reading “Not A Submission Or Leadership Failure”
Category: Forgiveness
A Survey Alert From Chump Lady
Today, Chump Lady passed along a survey that an eager graduate student in psychology is doing on infidelity. Here is the link to Chump Lady’s post: http://chumplady.com/2014/07/forgiveness-troll-says-take-a-survey/ Below I am quoting from Chump Lady’s post where she agrees to take the survey and post it to her readership: Then when I finished the survey, I … Continue reading “A Survey Alert From Chump Lady”
You Never Really “Get Over It”
All his sons and daughters came to comfort him, but he refused to be comforted. “No,” he said, “I will continue to mourn until I join my son in the grave.” So his father wept for him. – Genesis 37:35, NIV Perhaps, I have grief on my mind today as I did a funeral and graveside service this … Continue reading “You Never Really “Get Over It””
Lock the Doors, Grieve the Death
“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted And saves those who are crushed in spirit.” -Psalm 34:18, NASB Metaphors, while being imperfect approximations, often can help us grasp difficult and complex truths conveying both intellectual and emotional freight with vivid imagery. Here’s my shot on explaining by metaphor why focusing on forgiveness first after adultery is cruel: Imagine you … Continue reading “Lock the Doors, Grieve the Death”
Grief and Forgiveness
“My soul refused to be comforted.” – Psalm 77:2b (NASB). “‘For if you forgive others for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions.’” – Jesus (Matthew 6:14-15, NASB). I suspect that most Christian survivors of adultery have been told that they have to … Continue reading “Grief and Forgiveness”
The Great Reconciler False Assumption
Assumption: Divorced Christians have a moral imperative to remain open to remarrying their former spouse regardless of circumstances of the divorce until that former spouse remarries since they are called to emulate God’s character of being the Great Reconciler (II Corinthians 5:18). False. God is holy and jealous. He is the same in both … Continue reading “The Great Reconciler False Assumption”
Buffet of Bad Options
“‘If a man is found lying with a married woman, then both of them shall die, the man who lay with the woman, and the woman; thus you shall purge the evil from Israel.” -Deuteronomy 22:22, NASB. While much is made of God’s proclamation of hating divorce in Malachi 2:16, I fear that many … Continue reading “Buffet of Bad Options”
Faithful Spouses And Letting Go of False Guilt
So, you find yourself stuck. You know in your head that you did not cause your spouse’s infidelity… But…and it is a BIG BUT… You still feel guilty. You wonder if you could have prevented the adultery by doing something(s) better. You have a bad case of the “if only’s” and possibly you still FEEL … Continue reading “Faithful Spouses And Letting Go of False Guilt”