I wrote this a few years ago reflecting on a college reunion. Today, I thankfully feel less entwined with those contrasting feelings since I have been back to the city of my alma mater a few more times with Mrs. DM. Obviously, a version of this post ran previously. This weekend happens to be … Continue reading “Surreal Grief”
Category: Sin
Mailbag: Long-term porn use biblical grounds for divorce?
Dear Divorce Minister, Thank you for all you do on behalf of faithful spouses. My question is, “Is long term pornography use adultery and valid grounds for divorce?” My husband has an at least 20 year addiction to pornography which he did not disclose prior to marriage. He has had counselling on multiple occasions and … Continue reading “Mailbag: Long-term porn use biblical grounds for divorce?”
WCF (1646): A Liberal Manifesto On Adultery and Divorce?
“Adultery or fornication, committed after a contract, being detected before marriage, giveth just occasion to the innocent party to dissolve that contract. In the case of adultery after marriage, it is lawful for the innocent party to sue out a divorce, and after the divorce to marry another, as if the offending party were dead.” … Continue reading “WCF (1646): A Liberal Manifesto On Adultery and Divorce?”
Divorce Minister Content and Chaplaincy Incompatible?
Is engaging in this sort of ministry incompatible with professional chaplaincy? Much confusion exists about what my profession is. People know what a pastor is. They understand what a Catholic Priest is. But people generally do not understand the category of chaplain. In addition to this confusion, professional bodies are in tension over chaplaincy. On … Continue reading “Divorce Minister Content and Chaplaincy Incompatible?”
Cheating, NOT a private affair!
And this have ye done again, covering the altar of the Lord with tears, with weeping, and with crying out, insomuch that he regardeth not the offering any more, or receiveth it with good will at your hand. Yet ye say, Wherefore? Because the Lord hath been witness between thee and the wife of thy … Continue reading “Cheating, NOT a private affair!”
Yes, we DO have a say!
The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife. -I Corinthians 7:4, NLT Cheaters are known to scoff at faithful spouses’ reasonable “demands.” They love to play the card that we have no say in their associations or activities. Yet they think they … Continue reading “Yes, we DO have a say!”
On Forsaking All Others…
Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. – Genesis 2:24, KJV In my fear of being labelled “controlling,” I had a difficult time while my marriage was imploding recognizing healthy jealousy and boundaries. And I suspect I am not alone … Continue reading “On Forsaking All Others…”
Deal with their contempt!
Most importantly, I want to remind you that in the last days scoffers will come, mocking the truth and following their own desires. -2 Peter 3:3, NLT If a cheater is still displaying contempt for their spouse, stop wasting your time on “reconciliation” work. The cheater isn’t repentant. Cheaters speak contempt with fluidity. I find … Continue reading “Deal with their contempt!”
PSA: Do NOT use your cheater’s therapist!
Public Service Announcement: Do NOT use your cheater’s individual therapist for couple’s counseling! One of my many mistakes with my first marriage’s demise was agreeing to see my (now ex) wife’s individual therapist for couple’s counseling. The therapist and her had worked with each other for months, if not years, by that point. I knew … Continue reading “PSA: Do NOT use your cheater’s therapist!”
Cheater Marriage History Revisionism: A brain in blender experience
Telling lies about others is as harmful as hitting them with an ax, wounding them with a sword, or shooting them with a sharp arrow. -Proverbs 25:18, NLT One of the many things that baffles me about the accepted Christian “wisdom” on healing marriages ravaged by adultery is how often pastors and counselors seem to … Continue reading “Cheater Marriage History Revisionism: A brain in blender experience”