You know the commandments: ‘Do not commit adultery,’ ‘Do not murder,’ ‘Do not steal,’ ‘Do not bear false witness,’ ‘Do not defraud,’ ‘Honor your father and your mother.’” -Mark 10:19, NKJV QUESTION EXCHANGE Instead of probing the faithful spouse regarding their efforts to reconcile with a cheater, I suggest putting the onus upon the cheater. … Continue reading “Question Exchange: Did you try reconciling? Instead…”
Category: Sin
“Unloved” Ticking Timebomb
Under three things the earth quakes, And under four, it cannot bear up:… Under an unloved woman when she gets a husband…. -Proverbs 30:21, 23a, NASB Marrying an “unloved” woman (or man) is perilous. Early in my first marriage, I remember thinking to myself that I would be able to convince my then wife that she was … Continue reading ““Unloved” Ticking Timebomb”
If half the energy put towards condemning divorcees…
Notice how some Christians feel completely free to share condemning opinions about divorce with faithful spouses but suddenly become silent regarding adultery with cheaters? It is so odd. The same people who wouldn’t DARE confront your cheater over her infidelity are the same crowd probing or condemning you for choosing divorce. They behave as if “Thou … Continue reading “If half the energy put towards condemning divorcees…”
Assumption is God Punishes Adultery
“That is why your daughters turn to prostitution, and your daughters-in-law commit adultery. But why should I punish them for their prostitution and adultery? For your men are doing the same thing, sinning with whores and shrine prostitutes.” -Hosea 4:13b-14b, NLT Notice how this passage from Hosea assumes punishment of the sexually immoral by God? … Continue reading “Assumption is God Punishes Adultery”
Please give divorcing faithful spouses the benefit of the doubt
Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not wanting to make her a public example, was minded to put her away secretly. -Matthew 1:19, NKJV With famous Christian author, Lysa TerKeurst, opening up about divorcing her unfaithful husband, I am struck by how the Christian community demands faithful spouses to explain themselves when … Continue reading “Please give divorcing faithful spouses the benefit of the doubt”
Raise Your Expectations!
Excuses might be found for a thief who steals because he is starving. But if he is caught, he must pay back seven times what he stole, even if he has to sell everything in his house. -Proverbs 6:30-31, NLT One of the maddening aspects of being a faithful spouse is how Christians will look to you to … Continue reading “Raise Your Expectations!”
Hardened
But this time also Pharaoh hardened his heart and would not let the people go. -Exodus 8:32, NIV The reality of one’s powerlessness is one of the most difficult aspects of going through an unwanted divorce. Yet this very real powerlessness can serve as a comfort after the fact! As an introspective person, I find … Continue reading “Hardened”
When the “dog” poos in your bed…
Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge. -Hebrews 13:4, NASB When the dog* poops in your bed, do you respond by telling your dog… “You’re such a good boy!” No? I suspect you do not spend time trying … Continue reading “When the “dog” poos in your bed…”
Reminder: Gospel Witness and Divorce
So this was the plan they followed. Ezra selected leaders to represent their families, designating each of the representatives by name. On December 29, the leaders sat down to investigate the matter. By March 27, the first day of the new year, they had finished dealing with all the men who had married pagan wives. These are the priests … Continue reading “Reminder: Gospel Witness and Divorce”
Dear DM, I read Piper’s book and thought I had to stay in my marriage.
Hi DM – Today was rough for me. A woman at my church asked how I was, and I answered where things are at…awful and that court is next month. Once she learned we were actually divorcing and not just staying separated she shared her stand that divorce is always sin, and how God hates … Continue reading “Dear DM, I read Piper’s book and thought I had to stay in my marriage.”