“Do everything they say to you,” the Lord replied, “for they are rejecting me, not you. They don’t want me to be their king any longer.” -I Samuel 8:7, NLT For whatever reason, recognizing the larger picture is helpful. Cheaters are not “just” rejecting their spouse. They are rejecting God. They may say otherwise. In fact, they … Continue reading “Really defying God”
Category: Sin
Their “honesty”
“I felt like I had to lie because you would get angry if you knew,” says Cheater. What the Cheater is really saying is that they feared not having complete control over you once you were no longer in the dark about the truth. Knowledge is power as the saying goes. They did not feel like … Continue reading “Their “honesty””
Phenomenon: Kid gloves with female Cheaters
“Rebuke your mother, rebuke her, for she is not my wife, and I am not her husband. Let her remove the adulterous look from her face and the unfaithfulness from between her breasts.” -Hosea 2:2, NIV I’ve noticed a phenomenon among pastors dealing with female Cheaters: They have a tendency to advocate for gentler confrontation with female … Continue reading “Phenomenon: Kid gloves with female Cheaters”
Shattered Self Esteem
He will not crush the weakest reed or put out a flickering candle. He will bring justice to all who have been wronged. -Isaiah 42:3, NLT Shattered Self Esteem One of the many stupid things about the dynamics regarding cheating is how all the sympathy often is sucked up by the Cheater. They are treated … Continue reading “Shattered Self Esteem”
Playing the Martyr
Some Cheaters are very adept at playing the martyr. They are the aggrieved party, not you. Yes, they cheated, but they only did so because you are such an awful spouse. They are happy to tell you what they’ve allegedly been putting up with that “drove them” to cheat. They are a marriage martyr. Often times, … Continue reading “Playing the Martyr”
Stick to your “guns”
Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. -Hebrews 13:4, NIV Stick to your “guns!” Do not waste your time with a pastor or counselor who wants to go over your marriage “troubles” while avoiding the infidelity of your spouse. This … Continue reading “Stick to your “guns””
Will not repent even in the face of counter evidence
For the time will come when people will not put up with sound doctrine. Instead, to suit their own desires, they will gather around them a great number of teachers to say what their itching ears want to hear. -2 Timothy 4:3, NIV Before discovery or even after discovery of an affair, you might experience … Continue reading “Will not repent even in the face of counter evidence”
Indifference to injustice is ungodly!
For the Lord is righteous, he loves justice…. -Psalm 11:7a, NIV Caring for faithful spouses is a justice issue, in my opinion. I know many issues in this world are related to the imbalance of justice. Adultery and adultery victims are not the only ones suffering from a world run through with injustice. Yet they are suffering injustices. If … Continue reading “Indifference to injustice is ungodly!”
Perfection not required!
10 “‘If a man commits adultery with another man’s wife—with the wife of his neighbor—both the adulterer and the adulteress are to be put to death.” -Leviticus 20:10, NIV After discovering adultery, the faithful spouse’s performance as a spouse is often put under the microscope. We, faithful spouse, might do it ourselves trying to make sense … Continue reading “Perfection not required!”
Bad Advice: “Love her back!”
“Rebuke your mother, rebuke her, for she is not my wife, and I am not her husband. Let her remove the adulterous look from her face and the unfaithfulness from between her breasts.” -Hosea 2:2, NIV Love her back! So often, this advice is what is given as the “Christian” answer to marital infidelity. It is an … Continue reading “Bad Advice: “Love her back!””