Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. -Hebrews 13:4, NIV “Yes, it happened. She cheated on you. And that’s right: you didn’t deserve it. It’s not your fault. Not at all.” You really want to help a faithful spouse. … Continue reading “Healing words for faithful spouses”
Category: Sin
Unmet emotional needs excuse
“You were all so busy with the kids. I felt neglected.” -Cheater “I never would have cheated if you had given me the attention he did!” -Cheater Thou shalt not commit adultery. -Exodus 20:14, KJV Your cheater may try to “justify” their sin to you. Maybe they will point to you spending too much time … Continue reading “Unmet emotional needs excuse”
Healing requires reality acceptance
O Jerusalem, Jerusalem, thou that killest the prophets, and stonest them which are sent unto thee, how often would I have gathered thy children together, even as a hen gathereth her chickens under her wings, and ye would not! -Matthew 23:37, KJV Healing Requires Reality Acceptance We have to put down our “should’s” in order … Continue reading “Healing requires reality acceptance”
Crazy ride? No thanks.
To heal, we have to acknowledge the truth. The sad thing is our cheater may never actually do this. They might engage you in an endless battle over getting you to take responsibility for their abuse of you. That argument is one crazy ride. Refuse to take the bait. While helpful, you do not have … Continue reading “Crazy ride? No thanks.”
Complacent Cheating
This is the way of an adulterous woman: She eats and wipes her mouth, And says, “I have done no wickedness.” -Proverbs 30:20, NKJV Cheaters can get complacent in their cheating. Because they have such big egos and such high contempt for their spouse, they may fail to keep up the deception. Their “game” slips and then … Continue reading “Complacent Cheating”
Seared Moments
Certain moments stay with us for a lifetime. They are seared into our memories in technicolor. I will never forget a walk I had near my old condominium in the city. While I was walking, I was talking on the phone with my now ex-wife. The walk and conversation are still with me today–over a … Continue reading “Seared Moments”
No Other Man Drama
So is he who goes in to his neighbor’s wife; Whoever touches her shall not be innocent. -Proverbs 6:29, NKJV My Cheater loved the fantasy of being central and fought over for her affections. I know this as that was the take away for her from watching the awful movie, “Fireproof.” The scene of the husband fighting … Continue reading “No Other Man Drama”
Part II: Dr. Michael Brown Firefly Misconduct Report Analysis
“…LOF retains FIREFLY to conduct an independent investigation into allegations of sexually abusive misconduct by BROWN in his association with FIRE SCHOOL 2001 – 2002 (which is defunct as a campus school), LOF (or any other ministry where BROWN held a leadership position). While the scope of the investigation is focused on the period … Continue reading “Part II: Dr. Michael Brown Firefly Misconduct Report Analysis”
Part I: Dr. Michael Brown Firefly Misconduct Report Analysis
“On January 13, 2025, Firefly was contacted to conduct an independent investigation involving Michael Brown, founder of the Fire School of Ministryand The Line of Fire – Dr. Brown Ministries, Inc., alleging sexual misconduct toward two adult females within his ministry.” -James Holler, Jr., “Firefly Independent Sexual Abuse Investigations: Investigation into the Allegations of Sexually … Continue reading “Part I: Dr. Michael Brown Firefly Misconduct Report Analysis”
Worse… so much worse!
Worse… so much worse! I remember early in my first marriage’s ending how I was hoping it was “just” an emotional affair. The whole not taking emotional affairs seriously was a problem I was yet to reckon with personally. The reality is the cheating is usually MUCH worse than what we see in the initial … Continue reading “Worse… so much worse!”