If a man is found sleeping with another man’s wife, both must die. Purge that evil from Israel. -Deuteronomy 22:22, The Message (emphasis mine) Those “friends” One of the most difficult lessons I learned from discovering my first wife’s adultery and going through divorce is that it is okay–in fact, good–to have deal-breakers in friendships. … Continue reading “Those type of “friends””
When the cheater sees you as the bigger transgressor
Hypocrite! First get rid of the log in your own eye; then you will see well enough to deal with the speck in your friend’s eye. -Matthew 7:5, NLT When a cheater sees the faithful spouse as the greater transgressor in the relationship, I see no hope for a godly reunion and restoration of the … Continue reading “When the cheater sees you as the bigger transgressor”
Dismissive People
For the Lord is righteous, he loves justice…. -Psalm 11:7a, NIV Caring for faithful spouses is a justice issue, in my opinion. I know many issues in this world are related to the imbalance of justice. Adultery and adultery victims are not the only ones suffering from a world run through with injustice. Yet they are suffering injustices. If we … Continue reading “Dismissive People”
Awful Lie: Bad marriages cause infidelity.
“For out of the heart come evil thoughts—murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander. These are what defile a person….” -Matthew 15:19-20a, NIV Bad marriages cause infidelity = Lie! When Jesus talks here about sexual immorality and adultery, I do not see any long explanation about the sad state of the culture around … Continue reading “Awful Lie: Bad marriages cause infidelity.”
DM Book Sale!
For a limited time, I have dropped prices on my book. Currently, I have dropped the paperback prices from $12.99 to $8.99. The eBook is now only $3.99 from its regular price of $7.99. As you purchase books, read, and share the ideas in the book, you are helping spread these much needed ideas. The … Continue reading “DM Book Sale!”
Growing in gratitude
Look at the birds of the air, for they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns; yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? -Matthew 6:26, NKJV The discipline of gratitude is the secret to an abundant life. Of this, I am convinced. Grateful people do not live … Continue reading “Growing in gratitude”
PSA: “Platonic” friendships don’t need hiding!
“This is the way of an adulterous woman: She eats and wipes her mouth and says, ‘I’ve done nothing wrong.’” -Proverbs 30:20, NIV Public Service Announcement: People Don’t Hide “Platonic” Friendships! Until one is in such a situation, one might never think about this commonsense principle. Innocent people usually act like innocent people. Guilty people … Continue reading “PSA: “Platonic” friendships don’t need hiding!”
If verifying the end of the affair(s) isn’t the first priority, you need a new pastor or counselor.
When a Christian counselor or pastor chooses to treat the ending of the affair as a secondary issue, you can be assured they are not equipped to deal with the situation in a godly matter. Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the … Continue reading “If verifying the end of the affair(s) isn’t the first priority, you need a new pastor or counselor.”
Oh, pets!
I thank God for the pets in my life! I can’t imagine making it through my divorce without Mr. Pickles (see picture above). He was there every night comforting me by sleeping against my legs. His warm presence reminded me that I was and am loved by someone. It was helpful medicine during a time … Continue reading “Oh, pets!”
Mailbag: Was I wrong to tell him to move out?
Dear Divorce Minister, First, thank you for the work you do and insight you provide. I do believe that God is for marriage restoration. However, not all marriages can be saved, and that is because not everyone will repent. Just like salvation is for everyone, but not everyone will accept. I am glad that your … Continue reading “Mailbag: Was I wrong to tell him to move out?”