You know the song: “Love and Marriage?” As it applies to infidelity from what I hear and know, I think it could be rewritten with the lyrics… “Booze and cheating, booze and cheating…” Alcohol can impair judgment. But I do not buy the cheater excuse that the “alcohol made me do it.” They never ought … Continue reading “Alcohol and Cheaters”
Engage in empathy to avoid errors
“Do to others whatever you would like them to do to you. This is the essence of all that is taught in the law and the prophets.” -Matthew 7:12, NLT Engage in Empathy to Avoid Errors So many of the pastoral care errors I encountered and have heard about could be avoided if those pastors … Continue reading “Engage in empathy to avoid errors”
Mailbag: DM, Please help me!
Dear Divorce Minister, Please help me! I feel destroyed by my husband and his parents. 3 months into our marriage I discovered he was a porn addict. At first he expressed regret, but as time went on and the porn continued, he started getting angry with me when I tried to confront him. We’ve been … Continue reading “Mailbag: DM, Please help me!”
3 Things You Need To Know About Adultery
-3 THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW ABOUT ADULTERY- 1. ADULTERY IS SOUL RAPE! The Bible is clear about the principle about how a married couple is no longer two individuals in a spiritual sense but are actually one (see Genesis 2:24, Matthew 19:6, I Corinthians 6:15-18, etc). Following from this oneness principle of marriage, any … Continue reading “3 Things You Need To Know About Adultery”
A Toxic Mark Driscoll Teaching Regarding Headship
“Let’s say, for example, there’s a daughter, and she’s got a close relationship with her covenant head Christian dad. That headship protects her from other boys who want to come along and be her head, tell her what to do, set an identity for her, abuse her, endanger her. It protects her from other young … Continue reading “A Toxic Mark Driscoll Teaching Regarding Headship”
PSA: To cheat is a choice!
Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery. -Hebrews 13:4, NLT Choosing to cheat is just that… A CHOICE! It is a sinful choice. And a God-defying choice. A choice that the chooser explicitly said, promised, and vowed … Continue reading “PSA: To cheat is a choice!”
Somehow cheaters think they will never get caught…
But if you fail to keep your word, then you will have sinned against the LORD, and you may be sure that your sin will find you out. -Numbers 32:23, NLT (emphasis mine) What amazes me is how cheaters seem to believe their sins and treachery are beyond discovery by faithful spouses! To be fair, … Continue reading “Somehow cheaters think they will never get caught…”
Faithful Spouse, Fixing Yourself Does Not Fix This.
For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God… -Romans 3:23, KJV While it is wise and admirable to work on one’s own sins, issues, and shortcomings, I believe it is important to be clear about one thing: Faithful Spouse, “fixing” yourself cannot fix your adultery-ravaged marriage. Despite what “Christian” books and … Continue reading “Faithful Spouse, Fixing Yourself Does Not Fix This.”
On Preferring To Be “Imagining Things”
Discovering you spouse has been committing adultery is an incredibly traumatic experience. -You want to be wrong–even crazy is preferable to the real traumatic mess this actually is! -You want your world not to be upended and obliterated like it is. -In short, you want to wake up from this nightmare. This is grief and … Continue reading “On Preferring To Be “Imagining Things””
PSA: A partial truth is still fully a lie!
So stop telling lies. Let us tell our neighbors the truth, for we are all parts of the same body. -Ephesians 4:25, NLT Public Service Announcement: Partial Truths Are Fully Lies! This is a very common tactic of caught cheaters. They will confess to the point where the evidence would make them look ridiculous but … Continue reading “PSA: A partial truth is still fully a lie!”