My ministry philosophy

35 Jesus went through all the towns and villages, teaching in their synagogues, proclaiming the good news of the kingdom and healing every disease and sickness. 36 When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd.

-Matthew 9:35-36, NIV

My hurt is burdened for those who are harmed through the infidelity of a spouse and abusive teachings of the church.

I met a wise, seasoned Chaplain years ago. He was a military Chaplain in the US Navy as I recall. I was exploring serving–a story for another time–and I will never forget how he articulated his ministry.

He said that he does three things. Remind them (sailors and Marines):

1. You are not alone.

2. You are not crazy.

3. You ARE loved.

I adopted that philosophy of ministry from that day to the present. It is the core of what I am doing here at the blog Divorce Minister: Taking Adultery Seriously.

It is easy to believe lies in these areas while going through a divorce from a Cheater. We struggle with feeling alone. We struggle with feeling crazy. And we struggle with feeling unlovable–forever “damaged goods.” I know I did.

Today, I am here to hold space for you, to let you know that you ARE loved, to let you know that you are not alone (our number is legion), and to let you know that you are not crazy.

Chumpalooza reminded me how rare my voice is in the wilderness of infidelity discovery and divorce. Too often, faithful spouses are abused by the shepherds as opposed to nurtured and protected by them.

I hope you know that I dearly care about each of you, and I am glad you found your way to this digital shore. You are precious and truly lovable. Do not let abusers and liars convince you otherwise!

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