Do NOT Respond In Kind!

A good name is more desirable than great riches;
    to be esteemed is better than silver or gold.

-Proverbs 22:1, NIV

wpid-2015-02-28-13.18.30.jpg.jpegNothing justifies committing adultery.

And nothing justifies having an emotional affair.


Just because your spouse committed adultery or had an emotional affair does not mean you are now allowed to have one, too. Leave vengeance for God (see Romans 12:19). And especially don’t go out and have a “revenge affair!”

Think about your name and integrity. Those precious, precious things are what is put in jeopardy if you decide to pursue revenge–especially in kind.

And temptation will abound during the time following abandonment and infidelity discovery. I know it is especially tempting to seek out the listening ear and support of a person who could be a potential partner.

Be wise.

Don’t put yourself in compromising positions.

Wait until the divorce is complete before dating again. Hold fast to your commitment until you are officially released. Be a person of integrity. And use the time waiting for divorce to invest in yourself even if the wait is an extended period of time. We all need some time to grieve and heal, after all. Plus, an investment in you is an investment you keep.

And remember:

Nothing justifies infidelity.


4 thoughts on “Do NOT Respond In Kind!”

  1. DM….as we approach Mother’s Day, I have a question. Am I wrong to not acknowledge my ex wife on MD? We’ve been divorced for a year and separated a year prior to divorce. As I’ve stated previously, she had an affair with a married minister w/kids, which is why I divorced her. In the two years since, I’ve made sure our (now) 15 year old son acknowledges her, but I do not. I do not think she was thinking of him when starting in and continuing an affair. I do not think she was thinking of him when telling him that I was the one tearing apart the family when I told her I would be divorcing her. I do not believe she was thinking of him when after being served, she advised me that I was not welcomed in their home and she’d instructed him to never let me in (even though I’d never tried nor asked to enter their home. Given these instances, I don’t think she’s a good mother, so no, Hallmark gets no money from me. I welcome yours and any other opinions.

    1. Deacon B,

      I do not think you are wrong not to send her a Mother’s Day card. You are already being supportive of her through encouraging your son to honor his mother. Personally, I think that is enough. You are no longer married. I don’t send b-day cards to my ex-wife. Personally, beyond what you have already done (by encouraging your son to honor her), I think this is the same sort of thing.


    2. Deacon-ditto to what my husband said. I don’t think you’re obligated to send anything.

      1. Thank you both. I will wish YOU Happy Mother’s Day. May God continue to use both of you, and bless your home,family and ministry. 🙂

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