“You need to focus on your stuff,” says cheater apologist.

“Sure, she cheated. But you need to focus on your stuff.” -Cheater Apologist What never ceases to amaze me is how obtuse some people are as it comes to marital infidelity situations. They could be convinced about the facts; yet, some still choose to apply the pressure on the adultery victim, not the perpetrator. Either … Continue reading ““You need to focus on your stuff,” says cheater apologist.”

Where are the personal responsibility people when it comes to cheaters?!

Where are all the personal responsibility preachers when it comes to talking to cheaters?! -Much is made of the faithful spouse taking personal responsibility for “their part” in the divorce. -Much is made of the faithful spouse taking personal responsibility to forgive their cheater. (In fact, they feel compelled to “speak into” the faithful spouse’s … Continue reading “Where are the personal responsibility people when it comes to cheaters?!”

The warped world of a cheater

This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but people loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. -John 3:19, NIV The Warped World of Cheaters When you have trouble admitting truth, your grip with reality will become looser and looser. Along with that loosening grip, your world will become warped. This … Continue reading “The warped world of a cheater”

Some People Just Prefer Looking “High-Minded” and “Neutral”

“The hottest places in Hell are reserved for those who in time of moral crisis preserve their neutrality.”  -John F. Kennedy (attributed wrongly to Dante) Considering all the people who love neutrality in the face of adultery discovery, this part of Hell must be rather crowded by now. Ha. Half-joking. Discovering adultery is certainly a … Continue reading “Some People Just Prefer Looking “High-Minded” and “Neutral””

If you are looking to you spouse…

Free Marriage Advice: If you are looking to your spouse to prove that you are lovable, you are looking to the wrong person. When we look to humans to fill a God-shaped hole, we will always be disappointed. Humans were never intended to “fix” us. Only God can satisfy the deepest longings in our souls. … Continue reading “If you are looking to you spouse…”

Choose better!

“Today I have given you the choice between life and death, between blessings and curses. Now I call on heaven and earth to witness the choice you make. Oh, that you would choose life, so that you and your descendants might live!” -Deuteronomy 30:19, NLT Cheater sympathizers often miss the real choices cheaters make. They … Continue reading “Choose better!”

Want to really help someone move on? Acknowledge the injustice.

Want to really help a faithful spouse “move on” from being cheated on? Acknowledge the very real injustices they have experienced. Christians who are so fearful of faithful spouses “getting stuck in victimhood” fail to recognize this important lesson. They fail to see that the healing cannot begin without first seeing the wound for what … Continue reading “Want to really help someone move on? Acknowledge the injustice.”

If marriage is so sacred, why do you give marriage defilers a “pass?”

If marriage is so sacred, why do Christians and others give a pass to marriage defilers–aka adulterous spouses?! Like God divorcing Israel over repeated adulteries (see Jeremiah 3:8), it makes more sense to me that people who really think marriage is sacred would levy stiff consequences to those who defile it. So, I do not … Continue reading “If marriage is so sacred, why do you give marriage defilers a “pass?””

Rob Porter, Mormonism, and Religious Never-Divorce Pressure

Last week, Rob Porter resigned his position with the Trump White House. His two ex-wives had accused him of abusing them during their time married to him. Porter is Mormon, and a recent CNN article talks about the role their religious faith community played in their domestic abuse stories. ***To be clear: I am NOT … Continue reading “Rob Porter, Mormonism, and Religious Never-Divorce Pressure”