If I could write my own ticket, I would teach a seminary class on helping adultery victims and holding cheaters accountable.
-Included in this class would be a primer on how divorce is not always sin as well as how divorce can be a mercy to victims of infidelity. Anger and ire ought to be aimed at the sin of adultery plus deceit and not the victims of said sins.
-I would expose “The Shared Responsibility Lie.” No student would leave the class without grasping how irresponsible and cruel blaming the faithful spouse for the cheater’s actions is.
-Plus, I would point out how adultery is soul rape. My hope in illuminating this spiritual truth would be to engender empathy and understanding for adultery victims. Being cheated on is a horrible soul trauma.
-Another lecture would be upon learning about grief and how pushing “forgiveness” too early is harmful. Basic commonsense says primary spiritual care for a rape victim is not to pressure her to forgive her rapists. The same thing goes for soul rape victims.
-Next, I would talk about cheater tactics and the need for true repentance for godly reconciliation. Pastors–in my experience–often are too naive on these matters. And cheaters are refined manipulators and con-artists.
If you are going to shepherd the sheep, you need to recognize when the wolves are feasting on your flock.
So much more I probably would cover, but those would be the major themes/lessons. Such is class is sorely needed, in my opinion, from people who are not bowing down society’s cheating permissiveness.
Adultery needs to be taken seriously!